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Thread: Love never reached for...

  1. #1
    AO #1 (fill in the blank) KungFu Basil Champion, Lost In The Jungle Champion, Heli Attack 2 Champion basilisk888 is off to a good start basilisk888's Avatar
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    Love never reached for...

    All of the new,
    All of the old,
    I can't see,
    I’m not that old,
    I’m sad,
    I have not glee,
    I hoped you would never go from me,
    I was a fool,
    I did not see,

    You were there,
    You were not blind,
    You had a heart,
    You had a life,
    You never told,
    You left on a dime,

    I always hoped,
    I gave up hope,

    You will never come,
    You are gone,

    I could have tried,
    I could have tried,
    I’m sad,
    But I could have tried…

    -love never reached

    this was a true time in my life and because of it I'm now writeing to get away from the feeling of emptyness... Never again will I see her so I named a person in a story I'm writeing off of her *sigh*
    Last edited by basilisk888; Apr 25, 2008 at 09:45 AM.
    death and life are one and the same

  2. #2
    Otaku crimson is off to a good start crimson's Avatar
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    Re: Love never reached for...

    it was nice, really nic actually... i could realte to it in a way or another... just one gramattical thing:

    Quote Originally Posted by basilisk888 View Post
    All of the new,
    All of the old,
    I can’t not see,
    (can't alredy means 'can not' so saying 'can't not' actually means you can... so if ever that's what you really meant to shar,then sorry... just ignore htis comment)
    I’m not that old,
    I’m sad,
    I have not glee,
    I hoped you would never go from me,
    I was a fool,
    I did not see,
    anyway... i liked the way that the lines were short, it added a rythmic patter to the way you read it, it makes you feel more into the poem than normal...

    keep up the good work!
    i'll choose to love whoever i wish to love and nobody can stop me from doing so ----

    crimson
    edited from SamBakZa.net

  3. #3
    AO #1 (fill in the blank) KungFu Basil Champion, Lost In The Jungle Champion, Heli Attack 2 Champion basilisk888 is off to a good start basilisk888's Avatar
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    Re: Love never reached for...

    Quote Originally Posted by crimson View Post
    it was nice, really nic actually... i could realte to it in a way or another... just one gramattical thing:



    anyway... i liked the way that the lines were short, it added a rythmic patter to the way you read it, it makes you feel more into the poem than normal...

    keep up the good work!
    upset when I made it T.T never tried to read it over...
    death and life are one and the same

  4. #4
    AO #1 (fill in the blank) KungFu Basil Champion, Lost In The Jungle Champion, Heli Attack 2 Champion basilisk888 is off to a good start basilisk888's Avatar
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    Re: Love never reached for...

    well if your reading this Erica now you know T.T
    -from the boy who was alone
    death and life are one and the same

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