Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
Nari: A common girl with a few perks, she likes cats too much (Her room says it all).
Sentomi: A business woman and mother of Nari, she hates anything pink.
Opening setting: (Cloths Etc.)
Tokyo: A dark moonless night.
Mera: In gothic type clothing with a red streak in her hair. (She can’t take off the bangles).
Serios: Still in his incubus outfit.
Sentomi: In a commons Japanese woman’s wear.
Nari: In school uniform. (She takes night school to make-up for a failed class from last year)
It will start out with Mera walking down a market street in lower Tokyo.
Bully 1: Hey who’s that?
Bully 2: Huh?
Bully 1: Duh her! (Hits #2)
Bully 3: Stop you two, she going down the ally.
Bully 1: Let’s go say hi.
(They follow her to the ally)
Bully 1: Where did she go!
Bully 3: Let’s get out of here.
Bully 2: Right.
Mera: Such idiot’s. (While on-top of a apartment roof)
Serios: You need to find some help soon you know.
Mera: I know, but I thought if you talked to me anymore you would get banned too.
Serios: I guess I came to say good-bye.
Mera: So that’s it. Just leave me here with no where to go!
Serios: Sorry but that’s the rules.
Mera: Take care. (Hugs Serios while he disappears)
(Mera goes back down to the ally)
Mera: Now what to do? (Sees Nari for the first time)
Mera: What is that girl doing out at this time? (Walks into the sidewalk)
(Now to Nari, who’s getting one last thing before going home)
*Nari: Mom told me to get some milk so, where is it?
Nari: Sir, where’s the milk at?
Store clerk: By the ice cream in the back.
Nari: Thank you.
(Nari get’s the milk)
Mera: If that silly girl keeps this up she’s going to become dog meat.*(I better follow her)
(Nari’s walking home while Mera’s following her)
(Nari stops, Mera does also)
Nari: Why are you following me? *(That’s a creepy outfit she’s wearing, does it come in blue?)
Mera: I wanted to ask you something.
Mera: Well, I was wondering if you could help me.
Nari: Huh? How?
Mera: Could you give me place too stay for the night?
Nari: You have some nerve asking me that and I don’t even know you!
Mera: Well…My names Mera!
Nari: Fine but you have to leave after tonight got it.
Mera: Sure *(Jerk)
(Nari walks into the door with Mera following)
Nari: I’m home mom!
Sentomi: Did you get the milk?
Nari: Yes mom.
Nari: Stay her for now ok Mera.
Sentomi: what’s taking so long, this cake won’t bake it’s self I need that milk.
(Nari walks into the kitchen)
Nari: Could you do me a favor?
Sentomi: That depends, is it another school uniform?
Nari: Not really.
Nari: Can a friend of mine stay over for a night?
Sentomi: Does this friend have a name?
Sentomi: Mera…no last name?
(The Family name of Nari and Sentomi is Kitsua)
Sentomi: Mera you can come in now.
(Mera walks in)
Sentomi: How come Nari never mentioned you before and, why do you need to stay? *(Cool outfit does it come in purple?)
Sentomi: Never mind that just have a seat.
Mera: Thank you very much maim. *(She’s not mad at Nari?)
Mera: Your name?
Sentomi: Sentomi Kitsua
Nari: Watch it that’s too much flour!
(Nari, Sentomi, and then Mera all laugh together)
(One hour later while Mera’s still at the table)
Sentomi: It’s done!
Nari: Great, I’m coming!
(Nari comes down stares in a night gown)
Nari: Why haven’t you dressed? *(I hope I don’t have to give her my stuff)
Sentomi: Don’t be rude, give are guest here a futon and some cloths. (She put’s the cake on the table)
Nari: Fine, come with me Mera.
Mera: Thanks once again.
(Mera takes cloths off and starts a shower)
*Mera: So this is what it’s like down here after all, it’s nice.
(Mera get's dressed)
Nari: Here’s your bed and don’t get any ideas about my room. (Shows Mera her Cat-tastic room and Mera’s bed which is about 3 feet from Nari’s)
Nari: Well time to have cake and shrimp!
(Image of a shrimp cake pops into Mera’s head)
Sentomi: Ok the foods getting cold.
Nari: Coming mom.
(Nari, Mera, and Sentomi eat a shrimp bowl of soup and a cake for dessert)
(Mera and Nari are in bed)
Nari: Some how I know you’re more than what you seem to be.
(Shoots to a scene where Mera’s scared)
*Mera: Oh, crap
Nari: I can see it in your eyes your hiding something.
Mera: You can?
Nari: Well you will tell me sometime later I hope.
Mera: Hey… are you asleep?
(Nari is asleep)
Mera: I find someone to help me then they fall asleep. *(Jerk)
(*) The Character is thinking to themself.
Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
good job once again! :)
i bet youre working hard on ch 3?
Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
In case you haven’t kept up it’s been five days since this Manga/Story began.
Kumo: His basically a cocky school bully to Kera, He hates fights though. (I wonder why he hates them?)
Setting: (Cloths Etc.)
Tokyo: A normal heat wave ridden day.
Mera: Night gown wear. (Gothic outfit for later)
Sentomi: In a Japanese business woman’s wear.
Nari: In Night gown wear. (Still has normal wear for later)
It will start out with them waking up, of course.
Mera: Hey Nari where are you?
Nari: In the closet.
(Nari Dresses herself)
(Nari gets out a dress/kimono and shows it to Mera)
Mera: What’s that for?
Nari: I forgot to tell you I am going to a tea ceremony with my mom tonight.
Mera: With who?
Nari: Well her boss of course.
Mera: What for?
Nari: Well I hope she will get a promotion out of it.
Mera: Where is it at?
(Nari points out the window to the west at a shrine (By accident))
Mera: Is there one for me?
Nari: You want to come? (Puzzled look on her face)
Nari: I got this pink one, mom hates so much.
Mera: It’s fine.
Nari: Try it on, I will make breakfast.
(Nari goes down stairs, while Mera tries on a pink Koi fish kimono)
Nari: Mom are you gone already?
Sentomi: Time for me to go to work, mind getting Mera a new look?
Sentomi: The money is on the table next to the dishes.
Nari: Thanks mom.
Nari: Hey Mera I will be doing dishes so make the beds please.
Mera: Will do. *(I’m in a Kimono and she wants me to…she’s got some nerve)
(Nari finishes the dishes, Mera fixes the beds)
*Nari: I have no idea why I’m doing this for her; something about her just said I should.
(Don’t forget Succubus/Incubus can read dreams and sense feelings)
Mera: Is this fine?
(Mera goes down stairs)
Nari: You got to be kidding me, fix that bow.
(Nari fixes the bow)
Mera: Sure Just let me change.
Nari: Try to leave it on the bed for tonight.
(Mera’s all dressed into her Gothic cloths again and comes down stairs)
Nari: Here you go!
(Puts toast and eggs on table)
Mera: I can’t thank you enough for all your help.
Nari: You can stay as long as you like it’s no problem
(They start eating).
Nari: After this we can go to the market.
Mera: For cloths?
Nari: Yeah and some stuff for the ceremony.
Mera: By the way can you teach me what to do there?
Nari: Just follow my lead. (Smiles)
Mera: Will do. (Grins)
(They finish eating)
Nari: Just wait at the door I will get ready to go.
Nari: Since today is Sunday I don’t have to work or go to school, were free all day. (Laughs)
(Mera’s waiting at the door and Nari comes running into the scene)
Mera: Ready to go?
(Nari locks the door, they start walking down the steps)
Kumo: Hey Kera I will leave you alone if you tell me where’s my dog?
Kera: I saw him over there ok!
(Kumo picks up Kera and holds him)
(Kera points down the ally)
Nari: Kumo Izaki leave him alone!
(Nari points at Kumo)
Kumo: You ruin all the fun.
Kumo: I’m going.
*Mera: It’s that boy again, his eyes are so innocent.
(Mera’s frozen in place once again)
Nari: Mera I want you to meet Kera a old friend of mine.
Nari: Not like that.
(Kera grins and Nari pulls Mera to him)
Kera: Nice to meet you miss? *(Weird outfit, cool hair though)
Kera: Just Mera?
Mera: Yeah, you are?
Kera: Kera Azaki
Mera: Got any friends to help you with that guy?
Kera: Not really, But Nari helps every once in awhile.
(Of course by this time Mera is awestruck, frozen, and blushing)
Kera: Well I got to go home.
Mera: Where’s that?
Kera: It’s ok. (He points to the shrine that Nari pointed to earlier)
Mera: In a shrine?
Kera: No silly right behind it. (He laughs) *(Hey does she have a boyfriend?)
Nari: Hey Kera will I see you at the ceremony?
(Kera smiles and walks away, to home)
Nari: We need to go shopping.
Mera: Is he related to your mom’s boss?
Nari: Yeah, but he’s wife died in a car crash long ago.
Nari: Such a selfless woman she was.
(Nari start’s crying)
Nari: Sorry I can’t help it.
Mera: Its ok, sometimes you need to cry.
(They go to the market)
Nari: Hey Mera do you like this hair pin?
(Nari shows Mera a Hair pin with a Koi fish on it)
Mera: It will work with the Kimono, but does it come in a pattern style? (A fish with stripes basically)
Nari: Yeah here you go.
(They find some cloths)
Nari: Here’s a school uniform for you.
Mera: Thanks. (Looks at Nari stupidly)
Mera: Hey Nari I found a nice skirt and shoes.
Nari: After that and a top or two were done.
(Nari Buys Mera Cloths (Underwear, Tops, Skirts, Shoes, The hair pin, A school uniform))
(They head for home)
Mera: Why are you helping me so much?
Nari: Never really thought about it.
Nari: Well something about you says that I can trust you.
Mera: That’s it?
*Mera: This girl is way to nice to me, what does she want from me?
Nari: Mom I’m home! (While opening the door)
Sentomi: We need to get ready for the ceremony.
(*) The Character is thinking to them-selves.
Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
good job once again?
but it strikes me as wierd that nari's mom would want to help mera just like that...
its still a good story. :)
Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
Mr.Yakota: Kera’s Dad, and travel agency business man.
Tokyo: A heat wave ridden day.
Mera: In a normal girls wear.
Sentomi: A business suit.
Nari: In a normal girls wear.
Tokyo: A Dark and Full Moon night.
Kera: In a Traditional ceremonial over-shirt and pants.
Mera: In a Pink Koi kimono with a Koi hair pin, Sentomi hates it.
Nari: In a blue cherry blossom kimono with bunted hair.
Mr.Yakota: In a Traditional ceremonial over-shirt and pants.
Sentomi: In a light blue lotus kimono.
Serios: In a waiter’s disguise.
*Sentomi: I need to go ahead and ask Mera.
Sentomi: Nari go ahead and start getting the stuff.
Sentomi: Mera come with me please.
(Sentomi and Mera Goes to the den/living room)
Sentomi: I never really have time to know any of Nari’s friends.
Sentomi: Can you tell me anything about yourself?
Sentomi: You don’t have too but…
Mera: I can tell you a few things.
Sentomi: Go ahead:
(Mera has an Oh’ crap look on her face by this time)
*Mera: I can’t tell her everything but I should try too.
Mera: Well my family is complicated…
Mera: My parents are in the killing business and, my mom doesn’t want me too be a part of that life.
Sentomi: Are they in the military?
Mera: No…it’s something like that though.
Sentomi: you don’t have to go into detail, you can tell us later.
Mera: Well anyways my mom doesn’t want me to do the work that she does so…
Mera: She sent me away to save me.
Sentomi: I see.
Sentomi: With no where to go?
Mera: That’s right.
Sentomi: She must be really high profile then.
*Mera: Only if you knew.
Sentomi: I can let you stay here as long as you like but you need to do one thing for me.
(Mera’s got a go-to attitude after Sentomi says that)
Mera: Anything at all.
Sentomi: I think your mom would want you to go to school right?
Mera: Yeah, why are you helping me so much?
Sentomi: Don’t know, it’s just ever since that one accident, It seems like you fill up a hole in my heart.
Mera: A whole?
Sentomi: Yeah, after Nari’s father died in that car crash I cant help it I have to help anyone I come across.
Mera: I see, thank you very much for all of you help.
Sentomi: No problem.
(Sentomi hugs Mera)
(Sentomi laughs a little bit then Mera joins in)
Mera: What was that?
(Sentomi and Mera run up stairs)
Mera: Nari are you ok?
Nari: Yeah I just fell.
Sentomi: You tried to get the kimono off the top of the closet right?
Sentomi: I don’t need something that classy.
Mera: What kimono?
Sentomi: A kimono from the 1900’s, 100% silk too.
(Clock rings for 6:00Pm)
Sentomi: Wee need to get ready for the ceremony.
(They all get dressed and ready to go)
*Mera: It’s time to prove something for myself.
(They leave at 6:40PM to get at the tea house ceremony at 7:00)
(There at the front door of the tea house near the shrine)
Nari: Everyone ready?
(They open the tea house door)
Waitress: Hello, I will be your host today.
Sentomi: Do you know where Mr.Yakota?
Waitress: Yes, Follow me.
*Mera: I hope Kera is there.
(They go to Mr.Yakota’s dinner room.)
Sentomi: Hello sir, how was your day?
(The girls are sitting down and Kera finally realizes the girls are there, the waitress leaves with the order)
(Mera and Nari smile at Kera)
Mr.Yakota: Hello Sentomi, my day was well.
Sentomi: Glad to hear it.
(Sentomi and Mr.Yakota talk about business and work while waiting for the order)
(Waitress opens the door and brings the first dishes and some tea)
Sentomi: On time as usual.
Mr.Yakota: Ah…it’s here.
Waitress: Anything else?
(Everyone nodes no except Mera)
Mera: I was wondering, can you bring me a fan?
Waitress: Sure thing.
(Waitress leaves, Mr.Yakota and Sentomi continue to talk.)
Nari: Can you pass the rice Mera?
(Mera hands Nari the rice, looks up at Kera and freeze’s again stuck in his reddish brown eyes and gentle smile)
(Waitress comes in and brings the rest of the food)
Waitress: Your fan.
(Mera finally snaps out of it, Nari gives her a curious look)
Mera: Thank you.
(Mera: Gets the fan)
(They continue eating, Mera starts daydreaming)
**Nari: Hey Mera I think we can take a break before dessert.
Nari: Since desserts later may we go to the deck? (She ask Sentomi)
(Sentomi resumes business talk and eating)
Kera: Can I go to? (Kera ask Mr.Yakota)
Mr.Yakota: Sure, don’t forget about dessert.
Kera: Sure thing.
(The girls leave ASAP for the deck and Kera follows)
(Kera spots Serios who’s on a job; he’s serving poison to a business man next door)
Kera: Waiter can you tell me where the deck is?
(Serios stops poring laced tea leaves his room and stands in front of Kera)
*Serios: Did he see me pour the tea?
Serios: I am going that way myself, follow me.
(Serios hands the teas to a waitress near by)
*Serios: I hope he doesn’t ask a dumb question.
(Kera and Serios spot Mera and Nari)
Kera: Hey you two, you left me behind.
(The girls turn and smile innocently, Mera spots Serios)
Serios: Excuse me miss you have rice on your collar.
(Serios quickly walks over to Mera, while pretending to wipe rice off her shirt)
(Serios hands Mera a Red book and a Letter, she quickly hides them)
Serios: All done.
Mera: Thank you very much sir.
(Serios leaves quickly)
(Kera sits down on the small deck, looks at the moon)
Kera: Have you ever wondered what makes the moon so mysterious?
(The girls sit down too)
Nari: Yeah, all the time.
Mera: It looks like a big round rock but I even wonder sometimes.
Mera: Hey Kera do you go to school with Nari?
Kera: Yes I do.
(Nari ruins the moment)
Nari: Guess what, Mera will too I hope.
Mera: I am.
Nari: I thought you lived somewhere else.
Mera: Not anymore.
Kera: I see. (He chuckles)
Nari: What’s that suppose to mean?
Kera: Oh nothing.
(Mera breaks the ice)
Mera: Sometimes I wonder what we can do to make other and ourselves happy.
Kera: Well first we have to ask. What makes us happy? Second we need to know. What makes them happy? Then we pair them together understand?
Nari: Yeah I think I got it.
Mera: What makes you happy Kera?
Kera: If anyone else is happy, I guess.
Kera: Hey are you two busy on Monday?
Nari: Not at all, right Mera?
Mera: Yeah, were free tomorrow.
Kera: I have nothing to do tomorrow so I was wondering…
Kera: Will you two want to go to the park with me?
Mera: It’s fine with me.
Nari: Sure, what time?
*Nari: I thought he was going to ask us out)
Kera: Around 10:00Am, I can pick you two up. Is that ok?
(Waitress comes into the scene)
Waitress: Desserts ready.
(They go back into the dinner room, sits down, start eating again)
Sentomi: Mr.Yakota it’s time for us to go.
Mr.Yakota: Sure thing, see you for the meeting Tuesday.
(Mera waves goodbye to Kera)
(All the girls leave, and go home)
Sentomi: I thought I was never getting out of there.
Nari: Did he talk your ears off again?
Sentomi: Time for bed.
Sentomi: Get a shower and go to bed ok.
(They get a shower and Mera is looking in the mirror brushing her teeth; Sentomi goes after Mera does)
*Mera: Why can’t I just say what I want to in front of him?
Sentomi: Time for bed. (Knock on the bathroom door)
(Mera goes to bed while Nari is already asleep)
(Mera looks out the window)
Mera: He’s right the moon is mysterious.
(She goes to sleep)
(*) The character is thinging to them-selves.
(**) The character whispers to the other.
Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
Since no one is posting here dont get mad at me for double posting...I need to update this story.
Tokyo: A cloudy warm day.
Mera: In her bed cloths, until she changes into normal cloths.
Kera: In his every day casual wear.
Nari: In her bed cloths, until she changes into normal cloths.
Sentomi: In a business suit.
Nari: Get up! Were late!
Nari: Yeah, he’s outside waiting for us.
Nari: Here. (Hands Mera some cloths)
Mera: Why me?
(They rush to get dressed)
Sentomi: There coming Kera.
Kera: Its ok I can wait.
*Mera: Where’s my book and note?
Nari: I found this in your kimono last night here you go.
(She hands Mera the book and note)
Nari: Let’s go.
(They rush out the door)
Kera: Hi there. (While smiling)
Nari: If you have something to say, say it!
*Mera: She’s hot headed today.
(Kera try to escape Nari and runs)
Mera: Hey you two get back here.
(Mera chases after them and they stop at the end of the street)
Kera: (Huff, Huff)
Mera: Don’t do that again ok?
Nari: I don’t plan on it.
(They all sit down and start laughing)
Mera: Where’s the park?
Kera: That way.
(Kera point to the left to the high school)
Mera: It’s that far away!
Kera: Yep. (Smiles innocently)
(They get up and start walking to the park)
Mera: What’s so special about this park?
Kera: You’ll see
(They arrive at the park)
Nari: I remember this park, me and Kera played here as kids.
Kera: Yeah we did.
*Mera: As soon as I get a chance I’m going to read this note.
Kera: Nari remember that hill?
(Kera points to the biggest hill in the park)
Nari: Yeah, we rolled down it as a game.
Kera: “Whoever gets’s to the bottom wins” game
Nari: Sure brings back some memories.
Kera: Hey Mera come’ on were going to the hill.
(They go to the hill)
Nari: So why did you take us to this old hill?
Kera: To talk.
Nari: Talk about what?
Kera: All of us of course.
Kera: I wanted to know more about Mera and why you keep her at your house Nari.
Mera: I can’t tell you much but.
Mera: I came to Tokyo to escape.
Mera: Yeah, my family had it’s quirks but I liked it at first, until…
Mera: Until I found out what they do for a job.
Nari: Which is?
Mera: Killing. (She starts crying, hint Sensitive moment)
Kera: I didn’t mean to make you cry Mera.
Mera: It’s ok.
Nari: You don’t have to tell us if you don’t want too.
Mera: There in the killing business.
Nari: Is it like the military?
Mera: Something like that. (Dry’s tears)
Kera: I see.
Nari: I let her stay with us since she can’t go anywhere else.
(Mera get’s up and goes by the cherry tree)
Nari: Look at what you did! (Hits Kera on the head)
*Mera: I wish I didn’t tell them that, I need to read this not anyways.
(Nari and Kera start arguing)
(Mera reads the note)
Note: Dear Mera:
I wanted to say good-bye but I didn’t get a chance to. I did this to protect you from what the other demons would have done to you. Anyways here’s a book I put as many useful spells in there as I can. Good luck, Seko
*Mera: Thanks mom.
(Nari and Kera move to Mera, Mera hides the stuff)
Kera: I’m really sorry for pressuring you to tell me that.
Mera: It’s ok.
(They go back to the park gates)
Kera: Hey Nari do you still like ice cream?
Nari: Yeah! (Smiles)
Kera: Mera I can get you anything you want too.
(They go to a ice cream shop, the girls sit down and Kera get’s the ice cream)
Kera: Here you go Nari.
Kera: You too Mera.
Mera: Where should we go next?
Kera: I was thinking, how about the mall?
Nari: Sure, I want to find something any ways.
(They all finish there ice cream and begin to leave the shop)
Nari: What was that?
Kera: Sounds like a car stopping.
Nari: Let’s go check it out.
(They all rush over to the crash)
Mera: Is anyone hurt?
Kera: Doesn’t look like it.
(The car catches on fire, Nari screams)
*Mera: I have to do something.
(Mera rushes into the inferno)
Nari: Mera Don’t!
Kera: Nari stay here she’s going to be ok.
(Kera goes for help)
(While in the inferno)
*Mera: I’m use to this heat by now.
(A little girl starts crying)
Mera: Where are you?
(Mera goes into the demon form)
Little Girl: Mommy wake up please!
(Mera rushes to her and finds the mother in knocked out, the little girls in tears)
Little Girl: Mommy Wake up!
(Mera grabs both of them and starts to fly out of the inferno)
Little Girl: Who are you?
Little Girl: An angel?
Mera: Something like that. (Smiles)
(Everyone around the inferno sees a shadowy figure flying away)
Nari: What’s that?
(Kera comes back)
Kera: I called the fire department.
Nari: Look there Kera.
Kera: What’s that Nari?
Nari: I don’t know.
(Mera lands near a hospital; she goes human again with chard cloths, she rushes them inside)
Mera: Please someone help them.
Doctor: I will handle this, thank you miss.
(A lot of nurses come into the scene to carry the mother to ER)
Doctor: Where did she go?
(Mera disappeared, then goes back to the car crash)
Mera: I got them out of there.
Kera: Are you ok Mera?
Nari: You scared us half to death.
Mera: I guess I did, I’m ok.
Mera: We should be getting home.
(They start walking back to the apartment, the fire truck starts screaming by)
Kera: I had a fun day.
Nari: Me too.
Mera: Me three.
(The girls smile and start walking up stairs)
Kera: Can I see you tonight then?
Mera: I guess.
Nari: What for?
Kera: The movies.
Nari: What time?
Kera: 7:00Pm of course.
Nari: We’ll be there.
(Kera wave’s good-bye and the girls do too, Kera walks toward home)
*Mera: Today was weird.
(The Girls open the apartment door)
Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
Very nice!! Havent read something like this for a while!! You know its good if I read it!! I only read good stuff!!
Re: Manga Idea : " Succubus "
Right now I cant post for this.
Exams are comeing soon and it's messing my thinking up.
I will update ASAP.