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Thread: Monster(based on Gaara from Naruto read at your on will because it is long)

  1. #1
    Banned ABC Crazy Champion flaminghate may be famous one day flaminghate may be famous one day
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    Monster(based on Gaara from Naruto read at your on will because it is long)

    I was born

    A monster,

    Evil leaking

    From my infant form

    My mother

    Died before

    She could

    See me

    I still remember

    Her lifeless eyes glistening

    In agony,

    A crimson spider web

    Although I


    She would

    Have hated me

    She died uttering

    Curses across

    The sea

    Of sand,

    Curses which brought me

    Into the world

    Curses and hatred

    Created me

    I was born

    A monster,

    A horrible

    Terrible thing

    Circles around

    My eyes

    Sadness pouring

    From my heart,

    Blue eyes

    Light as a cloud

    Though my mind

    Is black

    People would run

    From me

    And never

    Look back

    They were scared

    Of me,

    Thinking I would


    Their screams

    I still remember,

    So frightened,

    They could never understand

    I tried to

    Reach out

    To help somebody

    To see

    I never meant

    To hurt anyone

    I was mad

    Hotheaded as the sun

    My face flushed

    As I tried to hurt

    Another who had run

    I wish they would just listen

    I tried to apologize

    “ I never meant...”

    But still they would not

    Listen to me

    Nobody understood

    The sadness

    The pain

    I felt inside

    My uncle

    The one who



    Had taken care of me

    When my father


    All alone I would be

    He caught me

    Trying to

    See what

    Pain was

    I didn’t know

    Pain like you

    It would never let me bleed

    So I couldn’t feel

    Yet throughout

    My whole life

    I knew what

    It was

    I felt a different

    Kind of Pain

    One that could drive

    A normal person insane

    My heart, my uncle

    Had told me

    Was hurting

    The cure I did not have

    He said the cure

    Was love

    My uncle made me

    Believe that

    He said I had

    To earn it

    I tried,

    still everyone ran

    I tried to apologize

    As the all



    I tried to help them see

    I could never,

    Would never

    Take them for granted

    But Still

    They ran

    All of their footsteps

    Echoing across the walls

    Sadness enveloped me

    Like a great

    Black Sea

    An endless abyss

    Tears flooded

    From my eyes

    I’m trying to wipe them away

    Wipe all the pain away

    My uncle came

    Masked as a


    In black

    His attack ended

    In vain

    Only him

    Ending up in pain

    Dying, laying on

    The ground

    He stared up

    At me

    The his voice

    Echoed throughout

    My head

    Screaming the truth

    He had never cared




    He had just lied

    The whole time

    He had hated me

    For “killing” his sister

    I wish

    He could see

    That I was not to blame

    I am sorry

    Blood dripping

    From his lips

    In a horrible

    Final moment

    At last

    I realized

    I was alone

    In this sad world

    I could have

    Never imagined

    The pain

    I would feel

    The pain is like

    A spike through the heart

    Nails through the skull

    More pain than ever before

    Love was no longer

    There and

    I would never see it


    I had no meaning

    Nothing in life

    But then I decided

    What would do

    He had tried to

    Kill me

    So now I will

    Kill you

    I had my


    Finally something

    To do

    To kill all

    Who come

    On my fathers


    All who come

    To challenge



    So no one

    Can kill me

    No one can

    Hurt me

    Even those

    So innocent

    They’re just like assassins

    My father sent

    Love engraved

    In my forehead

    Bleeding to my chin

    I walked on

    My brother

    So scared

    My sister

    Was terrified

    To see me

    Horrid face

    Years went by

    All in a blur

    So many attempts

    On my life

    All of them

    Made my monster blood stir

    Like a poison

    Throughout my skin

    It made my stomach

    Hunger for more

    Sometimes It would

    Come out

    Without warning

    At all

    I was used as

    A weapon

    Against other


    I was just a tool

    Used by my father

    The horrible

    person he is

    A new mission

    Comes in

    An exam to


    New people

    I meet-

    Weaklings all

    Of them

    Though new

    Pain I feel

    All over

    And many bruises from the fight

    Tried to kill him

    Though I was stopped

    By another weakling

    Not worth the trouble

    More people

    A new foe

    My blood

    Leaking out

    My form

    Changing to

    The horror

    Of It’s face

    Like a demon

    From hell

    Coming from

    My Black heart

    He is most puzzling

    This blonde-haired person

    Protecting his friends

    Risking his life for them

    They are my prey

    Why would he care

    If they died

    He is just like me

    Experienced the

    Same pain as me

    Being alone in the darkness

    All alone

    But he has found

    Friends like I never

    Could , still he

    Wants to help

    He has shown

    Me friends are

    Better than pain

    I try to find them

    First my brother

    Then sister

    Can see I have


    Now I will forever

    Know, me

    With this blonde haired

    Will be friends

    He has taught me to

    Try to become friends

    With everyone

    He has inspired inspiration

    Now people respect me

    As a leader

    I would sacrifice my life

    To save them all

    I would endure

    The pain

    In the world

    So they would know

    So they would know

    That they have a leader

    I would suffer that

    To save them all

    I want them to know

    I am not a monster

    I am just and right

    A marvelous

    Now they have faith

    In my choices

    I would never

    Put them in any danger

    Memories of my past

    come flooding back

    In this never ending

    darkness, called death.

    A voice calling me

    from the other side

    Echoing in th long


    The voice is concerned,

    A person who wants to help me

    A voice of

    A friend

    Now, I see somebody

    Trying to reach me

    Trying to help me

    I remember He is my friend

    As I come back from the


    Everyone surrounding me

    Concerned looks on their faces

    The all came to me

    Wanting to do

    What they could

    To help me

    They are my friend

    Such contentment

    They give me

    They know I am not really just

    A Monster

  2. #2
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    Re: Monster(based on Gaara from Naruto read at your on will because it is long)

    yea this really shows gaaras feeling and it seems you really know this character.. nice job. keep up da good work

  3. #3
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    Re: Monster(based on Gaara from Naruto read at your on will because it is long)

    My that was a long poem,but it was a really good one. To me it was kinda a cross between beauty and the beast and some monster movie. It was like beauty and the beast cause it seemed like he needed someone to love him as he was to feel normal. It was like a monster movie cause it like everywhere he went or everyone he tried to save always ran from him cause the thought he would hurt them. Great job and I can't wait to read your next one.
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    Re: Monster(based on Gaara from Naruto read at your on will because it is long)

    ya that poem was rele long and i think my scroller broke lol, well first i would say that you should edit it so that 4 lines match into one without double spacing, and like spin said, you probably got Gaara's character on spot. something i would recommend is using bigger language to describe gaara's evil, because longer words are usually more descriptive, and nice job.

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