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Thread: My Own Confusion

  1. #1
    Lost in confusion Tetrix 2 v2 Champion Sazzy is making a name for themselves Sazzy is making a name for themselves Sazzy's Avatar
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    My Own Confusion

    More tears soon form,
    Then run down my tainted cheek.
    As Things move further from the norm,
    Revealing that I am so weak.

    Just so many tears,
    Making it hard to breath.
    Showing me all my fears,
    While slowly my mind starts to freeze.

    Pain soars right through me,
    I fall quickly to the ground.
    Unable to move so let me be,
    To die here, where I am bound.

    I can no longer stand it,
    Confusing from within.
    Puddle of blood grows bit by bit,
    Now my life goes strangely dim.

    All I wanted was to sort things out,
    Make things easier for you.
    I always made it worse and then shout,
    I'm really confused that I'm hurting you.

    So now as I take my leave,
    Don't ever be so sad.
    Remember to live and breath,
    Your life's worth more, please don't be mad.

    I know my rhyming doesn't work so well, I just sometimes don't know what fits right without spoiling the concept of the poem.
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  2. #2
    Newbie Serenity Carter may be famous one day Serenity Carter may be famous one day Serenity Carter's Avatar
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    Re: My Own Confusion

    Wow! It's really... umm...I luv it! And i guess many people can relate to it, since most times, the biggest fear of someone is hurting the one that means the most to them. It really hits the spot... Keep up the great work! ;-)
    Life's short so have a laugh about it

  3. #3
    Femmebot Rehab Colt Crouse Champion, Bookworm Champion, Hangman Champion, Connect 2 Champion Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows's Avatar
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    Re: My Own Confusion

    It's a little on the Emo-ish side (not my thing), and its a bit choppy twoard the end. But, I thought it was definately worth the read. I identified with the confusion. And, I absolutely adored the 3rd stanza. Overall, I thought it was rather nice.
    ... Not Ever Again...

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