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Thread: My Sin,My Redemption

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    Otaku Seirika is off to a good start
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    My Sin,My Redemption

    The echoing silence underneath the deathly grey sky.
    Crystalline tears, overwhelming sadness…too much to bear.
    Never forgetting the horrid power within my grasp, I try to let go.
    I walk away with this unpleasant memory overshadowing my mind.
    As I continue on, the darkened heavens began to mourn.
    Is it maybe out of pity, or maybe of empathy? They shed tears for me.
    I begin on this absolute journey, to find what I long for.
    In this darkened world of mine, nothing else matters anymore.
    Everything, condemned to the deep abyss of naught and emptiness.
    I leave all of it behind as I keep walking forward on this path.
    The last of my smiles vanish, continuously searching for my hope.
    For my light, I will continue to walk on this unerring path.
    I will continue to struggle—to fight to the very end of my being.
    There is no turning back from here. I will only go forward—
    Onward to my redemption.

    Become a wind, unfathomable distress. I'll hold back your loneliness.

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    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: My Sin,My Redemption

    Hmm... this poem reminded me of HIM "The Path" A LOT... and you know what? HIM is my favourite band and "The Path" is one of my favourite songs... so *bows*

    Another wonderful poem! And it, as well as that song, made me imagine you walking that path, imagine a dark path and a person walking it and imagine a garden of light at the end... Thank You for making my imagination work... now I can get back to writing again...

    And as always, your true fan is waintig for your next work Seirika! ^^

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

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    Re: My Sin,My Redemption

    This poem is indeed impressive I admire this poem grievly but i recommend it stretching the feeling a little bit, but everything else really gave me the feeling about it which includes the darkned heaven mourning for you this is really entirely different from mine i hope you give me somce constant advice on how to make mine feel more descriptive please and thank you. ^_^

    Magic intervenes when there is love in first sight.
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  4. #4
    Otaku Seirika is off to a good start
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    Re: My Sin,My Redemption

    Glad I was of some help,Lasura.
    Truthfully,Iam not sure if this resembles HIM,I don't know about "The Path," But you're welcome to compare.^.~

    Dark,thanks for the advice.I'll try harder next time.
    I put my feelings in my poems,nothing more and nothing less.

    Become a wind, unfathomable distress. I'll hold back your loneliness.

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