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Reply With QuoteWell, let's say this poem is like a cake. I eat my way through the crust and when I get to the centre, the most sweet part the cakeis no more.
What I am saying is, It would've been better if you expanded a bit ^_^
It's the end of my world
I relize that you are
Never comming home
Your smiles that forever
Will haunt me
I can't believe that day
That you left me
I didn't cry
But it tore me inside
When I relised that you are
Never coming home
All the things you said to me
Are a painful memory
That cannot be erased
Now the tears come
Once my heart
My soul
Finally relizes you are
Never coming home
Never.....
Last edited by Akura13; Jul 02, 2007 at 11:41 PM. Reason: Complaits it was too freakin SHORT!!(and spelling)
Phantasmagoria Lives On In The Hearts Of Their Fans, Japanese AND English!
"Because it's okay to hide your tears." - LM.C (Lovely Mocochang)
Well, let's say this poem is like a cake. I eat my way through the crust and when I get to the centre, the most sweet part the cakeis no more.
What I am saying is, It would've been better if you expanded a bit ^_^
-.-" okay, I'll be sure to go edit it now, K? ...............
Phantasmagoria Lives On In The Hearts Of Their Fans, Japanese AND English!
"Because it's okay to hide your tears." - LM.C (Lovely Mocochang)
Aye, sorry, but I like where it is going, but the emotions were about to hit me but I hit dead end ^_^;
There I edited it......how about NOW???? Is it "long enough"???-.-""
Phantasmagoria Lives On In The Hearts Of Their Fans, Japanese AND English!
"Because it's okay to hide your tears." - LM.C (Lovely Mocochang)
Haha, yeah, now it is perfect ^_^ See, an advise doesn't hurt
*coughcough* Sorry, but it is much better now ^_^
hehehe.....why thank you. Ahhh this took 15 minuts to write......
Phantasmagoria Lives On In The Hearts Of Their Fans, Japanese AND English!
"Because it's okay to hide your tears." - LM.C (Lovely Mocochang)
I liked it, and think it's fine being short. A couple of spelling errors, like 'relize', but other than that, it's good.
Attitude of AO MODS, according to beast
Because they have obtained that level they are arrogant. You have to kep in mind when you talk about these guys they are kind of dorks who probably didn't excel at much and this is their only outlet to flex their muscles. Their egos would suffer no less so the the forum suffers some more. Watch one way or another they will probably repond to this post with a threat. But there are better forums out there. Private messege Zev.
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