Nicotine

Nympho · Jan 06, 2007, 01:02 AM

I posted this in our poetry clan, but i also would like it available for comments from everyone.
This is about a <warning: corny> war in my heart. I cant fight it, and i cant let it get to me. And its so frustrating that i cant talk to anyone about it. But in this poem i hope you can feel a little of what i do.
*I free verse*

A cigarette haze armors your face
Knowing the addiction
I respire
Quieting my heart
My eyes fail to the hush sound
Walking slowly behind you
Making my way to your side
Asking questions to receive a lonely rejection
I begin to fade from your side
I’m finding answers from another calling
Risking it all
You take me down
To the bottom
But its too late, sickening smoke
Negative exposure
Burn me
Even when i leave
I will always return to you

*BlueFox1* · Jan 06, 2007, 05:44 AM

This is a good poem nympho and welcome back! I think that I understand what you are talking about in this poem. I must say that you did an awesome job writing this because I had to actually think to understand what was written! Looking forward to more of your work Nympho!

faia · Jan 06, 2007, 08:22 AM

thats awesome!!....i understand what you're trying to say..i also have (corny alert lol) a war in my heart, not with cigatettes, but with my friends well anyways love ur work^^

Nympho · Jan 10, 2007, 01:25 PM

Why thankies Fox!

Faia....i'm a little lost, do you think this poem is about cigarettes? LOL. Its not about cigarettes at all.

know1 · Jan 11, 2007, 03:33 PM

Its about bad habbits that you know are bad, but know you won't stop either.

*ketaro* · Jan 11, 2007, 08:26 PM

Hey nice to see you again nympho. Dude, nice poem you wrote there, keep it up and you know that i will look forward to read more of your poems.

*Kasai* · Jan 12, 2007, 03:31 AM

I think I see the connection of smoke in this poem. I'm not sure if it was.. constructed right. I'm sorry, I'm trying to find the correct wording o decribe my critique.

hmm. I do however, love the visual imagery you've given the reader.

Nympho · Jan 14, 2007, 02:30 AM

I realize that this one was a bit sloppy, i didnt finish the thought correctly. But what i did not say and connect properly was that this person i am speaking of, we met under a cigerette and thats what i always remember about him. And now im drawn to him like the addiction of a cigerette. No matter how wrong and bad he is for me, i cant break the cycle.

Jan 06, 2007, 01:02 AM	#1 (permalink)
Nympho Upcoming Legend Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: I get bored easily Posts: 511 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 701	Nicotine I posted this in our poetry clan, but i also would like it available for comments from everyone. This is about a <warning: corny> war in my heart. I cant fight it, and i cant let it get to me. And its so frustrating that i cant talk to anyone about it. But in this poem i hope you can feel a little of what i do. I free verse A cigarette haze armors your face Knowing the addiction I respire Quieting my heart My eyes fail to the hush sound Walking slowly behind you Making my way to your side Asking questions to receive a lonely rejection I begin to fade from your side I’m finding answers from another calling Risking it all You take me down To the bottom But its too late, sickening smoke Negative exposure Burn me Even when i leave I will always return to you __________________ I'm a glass child. I am Hannah's regrets. Monster. Last edited by Nympho; Jan 10, 2007 at 01:23 PM.
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Jan 06, 2007, 05:44 AM	#2 (permalink)
BlueFox1 Devoted Otaku Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: A place called Midnight Sun know as Tranquility Posts: 584 Thanks: 8 Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts Credits: 1,286	Re: Nicotine This is a good poem nympho and welcome back! I think that I understand what you are talking about in this poem. I must say that you did an awesome job writing this because I had to actually think to understand what was written! Looking forward to more of your work Nympho! __________________
Status: Offline

Jan 06, 2007, 08:22 AM	#3 (permalink)
faia Newbie Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 24 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Credits: 150	Re: Nicotine thats awesome!!....i understand what you're trying to say..i also have (corny alert lol) a war in my heart, not with cigatettes, but with my friends well anyways love ur work^^
Status: Offline

Jan 10, 2007, 01:25 PM	#4 (permalink)
Nympho Upcoming Legend Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: I get bored easily Posts: 511 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 701	Re: Nicotine Why thankies Fox! Faia....i'm a little lost, do you think this poem is about cigarettes? LOL. Its not about cigarettes at all. __________________ I'm a glass child. I am Hannah's regrets. Monster.
Status: Offline

Jan 11, 2007, 03:33 PM	#5 (permalink)
know1 Otaku Join Date: May 2005 Location: here Posts: 260 Thanks: 0 Thanked 4 Times in 3 Posts Credits: 3,573	Re: Nicotine Its about bad habbits that you know are bad, but know you won't stop either. __________________
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Jan 11, 2007, 08:26 PM	#6 (permalink)
ketaro Its Over 9000! Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 4,247 Thanks: 27 Thanked 34 Times in 32 Posts Credits: 24,435	Re: Nicotine Hey nice to see you again nympho. Dude, nice poem you wrote there, keep it up and you know that i will look forward to read more of your poems.
Status: Offline

Jan 12, 2007, 03:31 AM	#7 (permalink)
Kasai Domme Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Florida Posts: 2,745 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 1,616	Re: Nicotine I think I see the connection of smoke in this poem. I'm not sure if it was.. constructed right. I'm sorry, I'm trying to find the correct wording o decribe my critique. hmm. I do however, love the visual imagery you've given the reader. __________________ Seduced by Flesh
Status: Offline

Jan 14, 2007, 02:30 AM	#8 (permalink)
Nympho Upcoming Legend Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: I get bored easily Posts: 511 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 701	Re: Nicotine I realize that this one was a bit sloppy, i didnt finish the thought correctly. But what i did not say and connect properly was that this person i am speaking of, we met under a cigerette and thats what i always remember about him. And now im drawn to him like the addiction of a cigerette. No matter how wrong and bad he is for me, i cant break the cycle. __________________ I'm a glass child. I am Hannah's regrets. Monster.
Status: Offline

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