Thread: no title

The flow sucks due to lack of punctuation.

Originally Posted by kira_17

Hold me tight don't say a word
close your eyes and whisper those three little words
Tell me how much you missed me
Kiss my lips saying how you remmeber our first kiss
How you wish we couls stay like this forever
With fears of us walking difernt paths
Hold me tight colse your eye's I whisper those three little words kissing you softly
Could we stay like this forever?

Starting from the 4th line:
*remember
*could
*different
*close and its "eyes" and this line could use some work on it

Its a good poem I guess but you have to be a bit more persuasive.
I like the concept you put in here and besides it looks like you put some effort into it. Maybe you should give it a title to make it stronger.
How about...?: "Wishes" or "Three Little Words" or "I Love You"
You know what I mean. I hope I don't offend you with the comments. I like your poem. Kudos!

YAY!!! Awesome poem Kira!!!! You always write such sweet love poems. Can't wait till the next 1.

I like this poem but like Angel said it needs the spelling fixed and also need punctuation like Kasai said. Then it would be a really good poem.

This is a nice poem kira! Keep up the good work and I hope to see more of your poetry here on AO! I can tell you wrote it from the heart, and that's the way it should be especially when you have someone on your mind!