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Old Nov 07, 2007, 08:12 PM   #1 (permalink)
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I look into my own eyes.
The mirror reflecting my soul,
as I gaze deeply,
into the doorway to me.

I see past my green ring,
and into the blackness,
of the pupil,
that holds my being.

I see nothing....
not me...
not the one I'm seeking...
and not who I use to be.

I simply see the eyes,
of a man...
broken and alone,
who has had everything taken away.

I don't look into eyes anymore.
I'm afraid I'll see,
something that I don't have,
or that I want that I can't get.

My biggest fear...
is the fear of losing her.
or the fear...
that she is already lost.


......
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Old Nov 07, 2007, 08:59 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: no title

hmm... this is a speech from someone who has lost something and hoped he will not lose another... right?

A very well written poem..the flow was very nice... ^^ and the mood fits well with the poem.. keep it up ^^
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Old Nov 12, 2007, 03:58 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: no title

Hmmm... I like this poem very much ^^ It just made my hear beat faster. Very sad and very scary for me.... I think you' ve done a great work, it has a nice rythm and it is quite simple.

At first I had problems understanding what are you sayig but it got clear at about the third stranza, it felt a bit odd, but maybe it's only good because it made me get deeper into the poem and search for all meanings.

Anyways nice poem, I enjoyed reading this and I hope to see more ^^
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Old Nov 14, 2007, 09:11 AM   #4 (permalink)
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aww the feeling of blaming yourself for lose of someone close to you is very hard to deal with. Its one thing that I can relate to and also fear losing someone close to me.

It really was well written and it flowed really well. I was able to feel what you were feeling as I read it. I loved the last two stanza's especially as they really captured the feeling of the poem rather well as well as ending the poem in such a good way.

It really was a great poem and I hope to see more to come
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