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Thread: One true love

  1. #1
    Newbie fredsboo is off to a good start fredsboo's Avatar
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    One true love

    Your what keeps me going through the day...
    Your the one who saves me from The fears in my heart...
    Your the one that means the most to me..
    Your the one thats always there for me even when I've done you so wrong...
    Your the only one thats ever captured my heart and never let go......
    Your the only one who's ever truly been all I think about every day....
    Your my one true love and will never be forgotten and I will never do anything to ever hurt or do you wrong agian....



    I hope yall liked this one I have anouther but not sure when I'm going to put it up
    Im the type of girl who burst out laughing in silents about something that happened yesterday

  2. #2
    Banned The White Wolf is off to a good start
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    Re: One true love

    This was a nice poem, fredsboo. The only thing I can say that annoyed me was the "your" used repeatedly in the poem, but spelled the wrong way. The correct form is "you're". I'm sure you knew that, and it was just a frivolous mistake. Nice work overall. Keep up the good work

  3. #3
    Newbie fredsboo is off to a good start fredsboo's Avatar
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    Re: One true love

    thank u I kinda thought it was a little bad not my best lol
    Im the type of girl who burst out laughing in silents about something that happened yesterday

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    ~ beri-chan ~ hamu-hamu may be famous one day hamu-hamu may be famous one day hamu-hamu's Avatar
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    Re: One true love

    Great poem except for a few grammatical errors. 'your' should be written as "you're" and there seems to be a mistake on the last word, again. Mix up in letters.
    Other then that, this is a very good poem. Keep it up ^ ^


  5. #5
    Lost In My Own World Fishing the Sea Champion, LastTank Standing Champion Ky-lyrra may be famous one day Ky-lyrra may be famous one day Ky-lyrra's Avatar
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    Re: One true love

    I have someone that keeps me going through the day.
    He's the one who saves me from The fears in my heart.
    You can see it in my eyes he means the world to me.
    No matter what I do I could turn to him for anything.
    He's the keeper of my heart, he holds it in his hands.
    My thoughts are filled with his loving face and his warm embrace.
    With my last breath I will tell him how much I love him.
    How I will never do anything to hurt him.

    I really liked your poem. Here is another version of it try not to use and start out with so many you's. Tell this as if your explaining him to someone as if your trying to get them to see what he means to you and what all he's done in your life. Great Job and keep up the good work.
    ™Mommy To Micah And Shawn!™


    Thanks For The Amazing Tag Pyro!

  6. #6
    Newbie fredsboo is off to a good start fredsboo's Avatar
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    Re: One true love

    Thanx everyone i had hoped someone would like it................................................ ......
    Im the type of girl who burst out laughing in silents about something that happened yesterday

  7. #7
    Heavy Metal Goddess CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18's Avatar
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    Re: One true love

    Very romantic poem. I have been lucky enough to find true love and I'm never gonna let it get away. Great job
    "Sunset Kisses Along The Beach"
    Made for me by HolderofTheDarkChalice
    Thanks so much I love it!

  8. #8
    Banned Rave_Grip may be famous one day Rave_Grip may be famous one day Rave_Grip's Avatar
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    Re: One true love

    It's awesome ^_^ I love it. I dore it! xD
    Anyways, I like the way the words are used and how they create and image in your mind.

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