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Thread: Patriots Reality.

  1. #1
    Otaku -=Broken^Halo=- may be famous one day -=Broken^Halo=- may be famous one day -=Broken^Halo=-'s Avatar
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    Patriots Reality.

    Patriots Reality

    Grinding gears of greased ghouls,
    Cover canisters with coarse coals
    Melt the metal with militia malice.
    Bomb ballistics to bring the balance.

    Masses play with nuclear chess pieces.
    Contemplating the movement of riches.
    Casting away dust covered riddles.
    To play with their death tuned fiddles.

    Drum thumps to rhythmic galumphs.
    Footprints followed in desert triumphs
    Political dances to bring forth dominance.
    Children track the footpath for prominence.

    Dormant patriots that view from afar,
    Bravely encourage the acts of war.
    While the hated children of sun,
    Wish it could end as quickly as it begun
    Fr3aK~0f~N@Tu|23

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    Domme Kasai may be famous one day Kasai may be famous one day Kasai's Avatar
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    Re: Patriots Reality.

    You have the vocabulary, but I think visual imagery is lacking.
    Seduced by Flesh


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    THUMBSUCKING ADDICTION Mr. K is making a name for themselves Mr. K is making a name for themselves Mr. K's Avatar
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    Re: Patriots Reality.

    *throws dictionay behind me*

    Besides the old fashion wording.

    Its a great poem. I get the harsh way.

    Um I could say more, but that just maybe the style//...
    ≥°≤ [?] █▓▒░░▒▓█ [?] ≥°≤
    You know how you drown a blonde, Rosalie? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool.
    Jacob Black, Breaking Dawn, Chapter 14, p.271
    Lamie Hynamen "I reject your reality and substitute my own."

  4. #4
    Otaku -=Broken^Halo=- may be famous one day -=Broken^Halo=- may be famous one day -=Broken^Halo=-'s Avatar
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    Re: Patriots Reality.

    It's not supposed to have "visual imagery" but rather portray emotion towards a subject... pay attention to how things are worded... there are metaphors and analogies that are used to show a certain point example:

    Dormant patriots that view from afar,
    Bravely encourage the acts of war.
    While the hated children of sun,
    Wish it could end as quickly as it begun

    This is calling all those patriots at america rooting for the war... cowards. and shows what we have as opposed to the piece of shit place we're bombing the shit out of.

    Sheesh.. maby I should use smaller words.
    Fr3aK~0f~N@Tu|23

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