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Thread: Porcelain

  1. Aug 18, 2006 12:47 PM #1
    Lost_Love
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    Porcelain

    Skin as soft as silk
    Love as long as hope
    Drifting away
    Floating away

    Lieing there
    in that box
    Lieing there
    I won't let them cover you with rocks

    Lieing still
    Juts like your asleep
    theres only one difrence
    Your just lieing still

    You body as lovly as when you had a light
    You gave up and ended your fight
    You let it go
    and nobody knows

    Porcelain
    as bright as the sun
    Porcelain
    as white as the moon
    Porcelain
    soft is your skin
    wasting away and missing your kin...

    Then they close your box and your face is no more
    Taken from me
    in the prime of my pain

    Porcelain
    are you wasting away in your skin
    Porcelain
    do you miss the love of your kin
    Nodding and melting and wasting away
    all day
    there are no raindrops on roses but there are still tears in my eyes...
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  2. Aug 18, 2006 12:57 PM #2
    Blade X
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    Re: Porcelain

    nice flow to the poem, a few spelling mistakes but it's great coz i dunno but i'm getting a mixed message....maybe u're representing ur loved one as the porcelain figure perhaps?

    i dunno but it's a great poem all the same

    Thanks for the siggy Ky-lyrra
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  3. Aug 18, 2006 04:17 PM #3
    hamu-hamu
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    Re: Porcelain

    Its a really good poem, though as Blade X pointed out, there were a few mistakes, but that doesn't matter.
    I really enjoyed reading it, sad...*sniff*

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  4. Aug 18, 2006 04:51 PM #4
    Shippo101
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    Re: Porcelain

    OMG! So beautiful! And true to my opinon!
    Shippo is determined to become a lvl higher
    I'm a solider of Pen and Paper!
     <3 Atomik_Sprout <3
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  5. Aug 18, 2006 06:22 PM #5
    Darkbloodsoul
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    Re: Porcelain

    I really like it. I think it flows very well. As the others have said, a few miss spelled words, but other than that it is very good.
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  6. Aug 18, 2006 06:53 PM #6
    N!tr0-Glyc3r1n
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    Re: Porcelain

    very good poem.....and very unique title


    thank u SasuraiHell
    go -=NOOBZ=- clan!
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