relax me

baikuza · Sep 15, 2006, 12:47 AM

white light..
sun shines my face..my eyes... my tears.
a soft light..
but it is a strong light for my weak heart
very comfortable for me
shining all place around me

the wind flows
bringing me, plants, animals, and insects the new life..
bringing me to another world..
allowing me to forget my hate.
allowing me to forget my sadness.
allowing me to forget my unsatisfulness
it fulfill my hollow heart with new fresh feel as a human being.

hope i can feel this a little longer..
runing from the hollow in human life...
which make me sad.
let me rest in here for a while.
let me take a deep breath before i come back to my work
just one minute more.

hope i can feel this a little longer...

Pride_Edward · Sep 15, 2006, 01:00 AM

This poem is kinda relaxing but the words are too deep enough. I can clearly relate to this poem...^_^

BlueFox1 · Sep 15, 2006, 01:38 AM

The poem is relaxing, just some of the word kind of cancel out the peacefully relaxation you are trying to describe! Overall good job on the poem!

baikuza · Sep 15, 2006, 07:53 AM

oh. thanks.
really, i'm not sure it is the best i can do.
but, thanks.

i make this when i'm in the outdoor and the wind flows..
that make me feel comfort. it was a place where i can get fresh air and beautiful looking.
many trees, and many book. just said it was library.

Sep 15, 2006, 12:47 AM	#1 (permalink)
baikuza Diamond in the Rough Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: should i? Posts: 298 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 110	relax me white light.. sun shines my face..my eyes... my tears. a soft light.. but it is a strong light for my weak heart very comfortable for me shining all place around me the wind flows bringing me, plants, animals, and insects the new life.. bringing me to another world.. allowing me to forget my hate. allowing me to forget my sadness. allowing me to forget my unsatisfulness it fulfill my hollow heart with new fresh feel as a human being. hope i can feel this a little longer.. runing from the hollow in human life... which make me sad. let me rest in here for a while. let me take a deep breath before i come back to my work just one minute more. hope i can feel this a little longer... __________________ .: Gallery :. .: My Live Space :. Last edited by baikuza; Sep 15, 2006 at 12:55 AM.
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Sep 15, 2006, 01:00 AM	#2 (permalink)
Pride_Edward Diamond in the Rough Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 247 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 110	Re: relax me This poem is kinda relaxing but the words are too deep enough. I can clearly relate to this poem...^_^ __________________ Our own site: http://www.fma-adikz.tk
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Sep 15, 2006, 01:38 AM	#3 (permalink)
BlueFox1 Upcoming Legend Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: A place called Midnight Sun know as Tranquility Posts: 584 Thanks: 8 Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts Credits: 1,176	Re: relax me The poem is relaxing, just some of the word kind of cancel out the peacefully relaxation you are trying to describe! Overall good job on the poem! __________________
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Sep 15, 2006, 07:53 AM	#4 (permalink)
baikuza Diamond in the Rough Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: should i? Posts: 298 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 110	Re: relax me oh. thanks. really, i'm not sure it is the best i can do. but, thanks. i make this when i'm in the outdoor and the wind flows.. that make me feel comfort. it was a place where i can get fresh air and beautiful looking. many trees, and many book. just said it was library. __________________ .: Gallery :. .: My Live Space :.
Status: Offline

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