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Thread: To Save Face

  1. #1
    Otaku OfeliasFire is off to a good start OfeliasFire's Avatar
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    To Save Face

    The rain falls most carelessly in this town of mine,
    and to me, that's just divine.

    Baby, this place is dragging me down lower than
    I could ever have found.

    My dreams aren't what they used to be, so tenative
    and sane.

    The pale of my skin meets sunlight to collide,
    it would seem I've just been biding my time.

    If only you could see the way my hands always
    shake, what would be the words you would say?

    If only you could see that far away look in my
    eyes, honey, you would be surprised.

    Lips slightly touching,
    cheeks brightly blushing,
    just a dream I've been having.
    Dear Dinah...

  2. #2
    Banned AngelicDemon201092 is off to a good start AngelicDemon201092's Avatar
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    Re: To Save Face

    This is wonderful.. i like the wording and feeling i got from it... I think you have great skill and should keep it up because i'd love to hear more from you.

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    Decapitation?DontBePicky! Raimann may be famous one day Raimann may be famous one day Raimann's Avatar
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    Re: To Save Face

    rele loved the wording. again this poem made me feel real dreamy, and thanks to your interesting rhyme style, the effect was pulled off quite well. reading this reminded me of all the bad encounters ive had in my life. i rele enjoyed this poem. keep up the nice writing Ofelias ;D

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    Otaku OfeliasFire is off to a good start OfeliasFire's Avatar
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    Re: To Save Face

    Thankies to both of you ^-^
    It gave off the exact effect I was going for.
    Yay!
    Dear Dinah...

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    Re: To Save Face

    Love the way you used the words.. and the way you desribe things... excellent.. a very good poem here ^^ kudos to you... keep up the good work..

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    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: To Save Face

    Awww... this is so nice... A really lovely work... I enjoyed reading it so much... reminded me of the time I fell in love with your writing *giggles* had forgotten over all that time...

    This poem has nice passion in it... lovely... dreamy... yes- dreamy is the real word. I love the way you put in sweet names, like "honey" it made it even sweeter...

    Hoping to see more as always I am ^^

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

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    Chtonian Slayer Astaroth may be famous one day Astaroth's Avatar
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    Re: To Save Face

    Wow.......beautifully done!!!!!!!!!
    I love the words!!!!!!!
    DO NOT MAKE ME UNLEASH MY INNER DEMON

  8. #8
    Otaku OfeliasFire is off to a good start OfeliasFire's Avatar
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    Re: To Save Face

    Yay...I am so glad people like my writing.
    I actually thought I did a good job on this one.
    and yes I am a big fan of baby talk words like sweetface and sweetheart...cutesy stuff like that ^-^
    Dear Dinah...

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