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Old Jan 27, 2007, 09:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
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The Shark

It thrashes it's tail,
Majestic in a way,
Its king of the ocean,
Never once tamed.
A real beast,
A real threat,
Stalks his prey,
Until he knows it's dead.
One row of teeth to kill,
The other to chew,
It opens its mouth,
Knowing its swallowing you.
Enourmous in size,
Means it eats more,
Seeing a juicy human,
It hears crys as your leg is torn.
Your dinner for the mighty beast,
Its satisfied so it leaves,
On to find another feast,
Come the shark, The mighty water beast.

its short but sweet right?
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Old Jan 27, 2007, 06:50 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: The Shark

Quote:
Originally Posted by Spin Da Ish View Post
It thrashes it's tail,
Majestic in a way,
Its king of the ocean,
Never once tamed.
A real beast,
A real threat,
Stalks his prey,
Until he knows it's dead.
One row of teeth to kill,
The other to chew,
It opens its mouth,
Knowing its swallowing you.
Enourmous in size,
Means it eats more,
Seeing a juicy human,
It hears crys as your leg is torn.
Your dinner for the mighty beast,
Its satisfied so it leaves,
On to find another feast,
Come the shark, The mighty water beast.

its short but sweet right?
no offence but your poem styles do not describe you. your words are written like a child, as juicy human. many peoms indulge in the words, using them as a canvas to paint your brain's ideas of the poem. i know you can do better, matthew. you are better suited to political poems, along the styles of what rap styles you used to do. so find your style, because this is not it. nice try tho.

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