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Thread: The Spirit of a Keeper

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    Newbie Kokoro_no_Ankoku may be famous one day Kokoro_no_Ankoku may be famous one day
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    The Spirit of a Keeper

    The following is a taster of a novel I'm writing, so please tell me what you think.

    The deep red eyes stared deep into it's soul. "Heh...", he said, wiping the blood from his lips, "You really think that you can defeat me? How many of your kind must die before you learn not to fight me..."
    The Demon flinched. Surrounding both warriors were piles of slain Monsters and Demons. It had come with a small army. The Keeper had dispatched them all so easily. It knew that fighting a Keeper alone was not a smart move, but a move it needed to complete regardless...
    The Keeper could feel the fear flowing from the Demon... He didn't like the feeling, but he absorbed it anyway. He knew that he needed the extra power if this was merely a trap...
    The Demon, ignoring the draining nature of the Keeper, charged with it's Broadsword high in the air. With no effort, the Keeper dodged the blade and drew his katana's. "Come on! Surely you're faster than this!" he called, laughing at the weakness of his enemy.
    "Alfie! Alfie! Come in!" the headset called in his ear, "It's an ambush! There is a large force of Demons heading your way! We're coming, so just hang in until we get there, okay? We can't lose you!"
    Alfie froze. He felt the one's called Greater Demons. There were twenty of them converging on his position. He could feel hundreds of weaker souls trailing behind.
    "So that's why you're here... You thought that delaying me until your friends got here would work... Heh... Well you're... wrong..."
    Black flame engulfed him. He was letting all the pain, all the sorrow in. He felt the strain on his soul, but kept absorbing the darkness. He spoke with two voices, one human, another demonic, "You see... My power... Nothing... Of Demon's... Stop me..." The red of his eyes glowed fiercely, and he ran at the Demon. He was too powerful and too fast for it. With one strike the Demon fell to the floor, it's left arm and head falling off the body. Blood sprayed everywhere, but Alfie paid no attention. He was readying himself for the large army of Demons, which he could feel coming closer.
    A green flash cut through the air, and Alfie turned to see his fellow Keepers standing battle ready. "Hey guys... What took you so long?", Alfie asked in his double voice, "You missed me kill that thing with one hit..."
    Flynn turned to him, and brushed away some of the skin that lay on Alfie's hair. "You can't have Demon flesh ruining your wonderful white hair now, can you?" she said, giggling, "You've got to look nice for the Greater Demons."
    "Right... if you two love birds have finished fiddling with each other's hair, you might want to know that they have just come over that hill..." said Bryan impatiently, as he pointed to the hill.
    Alfie looked at where Bryan pointed. He then ran towards the army. As he neared the Demons, he shouted out "Here's Johnny!"
    The Greater Demons, who lead the group, attacked Alfie first. He was too fast for them to hit him, but one of them plunged their lance through his shoulder. Alfie uttered an inhuman scream, and killed his attacker with a swift slice to the stomach. He dropped one of his swords and unleashed a blast of lightening at another of the Greater Demons, sending it flying through the air. A small group of Demons jumped on his back, and were heavily burned by the black flame that engulfed him. Alfie looked to either side, and saw his fellow Keepers cutting down Demons.
    "So much for your ambush, eh?" he shouted as he pulled the lance from his shoulder, and charged towards the surviving Greater Demons. "Here! Your friend dropped this!" he said as he threw it through one of their heads. The last Greater Demon began to flee from the battle, but Alfie wasn't about to let it leave. He teleported in front of it, "Where are you going? The party has only begun!", then grabbed it's shoulder. He placed his other hand against it's chest, and unleashed a large black blast of flame. The lifeless stump of the Greater Demon fell to the floor, with a large hole where it's chest once was.
    The last of the Demons were killed within minutes by the other Keepers, and Flynn called in for the Clean Up. Within seconds, a small group of men and women arrived. "We'll take it from here, Keepers. You can go back to the Den now. You did a great job." one of them called to Alfie and his friends, smiling.
    "Come on guys," Alfie said, grimacing as he saw the wound from the lance, "I need a shower..."
    Last edited by Kokoro_no_Ankoku; Dec 20, 2006 at 01:39 PM.

    ~"You can't do everything just because you have the heart and power to do it..." Lacus Clyne~

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