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Thread: Stories that go unfinished.

  1. #1
    Devoted Otaku bratling may be famous one day bratling's Avatar
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    Stories that go unfinished.

    Theres no disapation
    for this antisipation
    No fall from the crest
    of this quickly rising heat
    It just isn't like the rest
    It won't be beat.

    Building up higher and bigger
    It's too much for me to figure
    Out what to do
    because I can't get over you

    The look in your eyes,
    Makes me realize all the lies
    I've told to myself
    Making me wish I could cut some ties
    And take our book back off the shelf

    Our stories not finished,
    It's far from through
    Even if hopes deminished
    I can't stop thinking of you.

    The last pages to be written in dreams
    Because there simply isn't a means
    Of making them come true.
    Even if I did run away with you.

    A happy ending just ain't possible
    Because truth is, I belong in a hospital
    My love is toxic, noxious,
    detrimental to your health

    I will only wilt your flower
    Make you wither away and sway
    With the breeze of your fruit growing trees
    But lets you and me dream another hour
    Before reality steals it all away
    Just for now, don't mention any of them please.

  2. #2
    Newbie sparkels is off to a good start sparkels's Avatar
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    Re: Stories that go unfinished.

    hmm. it was good, i had to read it twice over to fully understand the depths of your poem. But i liked it.xP

  3. #3
    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Stories that go unfinished.

    Hmm... I like it... it's different... it seems more serious than most... more comlicated...
    Enjoyed reading it, made me think about a lot of things in relationships...

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

  4. #4
    Mathematical!! Bugz Champion, Ant Bully Champion, Chainsaw the childern Champion, 3D Net Blazer Champion, Cricket Challenge Champion, Big Uglies Champion, Body Check Champion, Desktop Fishing Champion, All Star Skate Park Champion, Chuckie Egg Champion, Birdy Champion, Anthrax Jelly Champion, Air Typer Champion, Word Pads Champion, Crash Test Dummy Curling Champion, The Mini Jump Game Champion, Chairlift Challenge Champion, Astroboy vs One Bad Storm Champion, Fight Man Champion, Blot In Hell Champion, Beeku Adventure Champion, Connect2 Champion, Atomica Champion, Cannonball Follies 2 Champion, Bada Boing Champion, BeachDefence Champion, Alkie Kong 2 Champion atomik_sprout has become well known atomik_sprout has become well known atomik_sprout has become well known atomik_sprout's Avatar
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    Re: Stories that go unfinished.

    Very well written, Chan. ^_^ Although, I don't believe that you belong in a hospital.


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    Devoted Otaku bratling may be famous one day bratling's Avatar
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    Re: Stories that go unfinished.

    Quote Originally Posted by atomik_sprout View Post
    Very well written, Chan. ^_^ Although, I don't believe that you belong in a hospital.
    I'm a little afraid it's going to be taken too seriously and used against me. It's expression yes. But it's not litteral. Maybe i should have kept it in my journal.

  6. #6
    Mathematical!! Bugz Champion, Ant Bully Champion, Chainsaw the childern Champion, 3D Net Blazer Champion, Cricket Challenge Champion, Big Uglies Champion, Body Check Champion, Desktop Fishing Champion, All Star Skate Park Champion, Chuckie Egg Champion, Birdy Champion, Anthrax Jelly Champion, Air Typer Champion, Word Pads Champion, Crash Test Dummy Curling Champion, The Mini Jump Game Champion, Chairlift Challenge Champion, Astroboy vs One Bad Storm Champion, Fight Man Champion, Blot In Hell Champion, Beeku Adventure Champion, Connect2 Champion, Atomica Champion, Cannonball Follies 2 Champion, Bada Boing Champion, BeachDefence Champion, Alkie Kong 2 Champion atomik_sprout has become well known atomik_sprout has become well known atomik_sprout has become well known atomik_sprout's Avatar
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    Re: Stories that go unfinished.

    Naw, you're straight. Who's gonna use a poem against you?


  7. #7
    Devoted Otaku bratling may be famous one day bratling's Avatar
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    Re: Stories that go unfinished.

    Quote Originally Posted by atomik_sprout View Post
    Naw, you're straight. Who's gonna use a poem against you?
    Taken wrong? Jeremy would probably not appriciate it very much.

  8. #8
    Newbie rukiasoulreaper is off to a good start rukiasoulreaper's Avatar
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    Re: Stories that go unfinished.

    I like this poem because it seems complicated but has a simple harmony to it. Nice job

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