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Thread: Tainted

  1. #1
    Newbie Lady Asphyxia is off to a good start Lady Asphyxia's Avatar
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    Tainted

    Tainted Rose

    Only a vision of beauty…is what they all adore.
    Darkness and insanity… they choose to ignore.

    Just like a rose…my beauty will fade.
    Leaving me with nothing but shades of gray.

    Drifting away from an empty shell.
    Lifeless inside…but no one could tell.

    Just like a rose…my heart will break.
    Leaving nothing for you to take…

    Just like a rose…I’ll entirely fade
    Leaving you memories of nothing but pain.


    Author's Note- Alright this is actually the first poem ever that rhymed in my collections of poetry. This was probably written a month ago, while in Lit class. I was bored from the lecture and decided to write this.
    ~Obviously you can't chat about anything...even if you explain yourself~

  2. #2
    「Someone」 Goo Slasher Champion, Fish Kill Champion, Rapid Motion Champion, Cell-Out Champion, Sober Santa 2 Champion, Flower Girl Champion KuwiRules145 is off to a good start KuwiRules145's Avatar
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    Re: Tainted

    Awesome poem! Hope you make more since I know you'll do good on all of them! Hope you make more anyway.
    「When I'm sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead」

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    Banned Big Bird Hunting Champion, Magic Ball Champion, Buzzer Champion, Book Worm Champion, Dragonfly Champion, Add It Up Champion, Trivial Blitz 2 Champion KimiFemi is off to a good start KimiFemi's Avatar
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    Re: Tainted

    good job Lady A i liked it
    it flowed very well
    but I kinda wanted you to go more into the darkness and insanity you hinted at in the begining ..

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    Newbie Lady Asphyxia is off to a good start Lady Asphyxia's Avatar
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    Re: Tainted

    Thank you very much Kuwi for your comment....and I will post more up. I would love to actaully go more indepth with that first verse...but possibly as another poem. For this one...I really aimed for shortness, I felt that it would have gotton annoying if it continued on with its ryhming scheme. But that is just me...at one moment I like my poetry...then the next I get sick of it.
    ~Obviously you can't chat about anything...even if you explain yourself~

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    Banned Big Bird Hunting Champion, Magic Ball Champion, Buzzer Champion, Book Worm Champion, Dragonfly Champion, Add It Up Champion, Trivial Blitz 2 Champion KimiFemi is off to a good start KimiFemi's Avatar
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    Re: Tainted

    >.< lol it worked out well anyway but I would love to see what you come up with next

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    Newbie Lady Asphyxia is off to a good start Lady Asphyxia's Avatar
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    Re: Tainted

    Yea, I'm actaully in the proccess of the poem called Insanity (Like I posted before). I suppose, I did actaully want to get more into the darkness and insanity from the first verse of my poem. After I had posted earlier, I had a line from the top of my head and started writing. So I'm multi-tasking right now (lol).
    ~Obviously you can't chat about anything...even if you explain yourself~

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    Newbie Sazurii is off to a good start Sazurii's Avatar
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    Re: Tainted

    oh that was beautiful. For something you did in class with distractions and stuff way nice. <---loves poetry
    No Way! I'm The Beautiful One Dammit!

  8. #8
    Newbie Lady Asphyxia is off to a good start Lady Asphyxia's Avatar
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    Re: Tainted

    Ty, Ty...lol what can I say...my lecture class was just way lagging that day. I'm glad you enjoyed the poem though, it means you had a nice read. I myself love it when I read other poetry from many talented writers...it makes me feel relaxed and in the flow.
    ~Obviously you can't chat about anything...even if you explain yourself~

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