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Thread: Tears of pain

  1. #9
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    its my 4th or 5th i cant remember but i try to do better each time i post one
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  2. #10
    Heavy Metal Goddess CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    I loved it. I wouldn't change a word of it.It's fine just the way it is.

  3. #11
    Otaku raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    Quote Originally Posted by HolderOfTheDarkChalice View Post
    Everything is gone now not a smile nor regret
    Everythng is fine now all thats left is sweat
    Everything has its moment and now the moments gone
    Everything needs a purpose yours was to die
    A poem filled with darkness!!! i liked the idea of bloody-thirsty theme. i liked th stanze above a lot! i think your poem should be left in that way, because it is really worth reading.

    Thank you very much,Reese for this wonderful signature ^_^

  4. #12
    Otaku tupacs_wifey may be famous one day tupacs_wifey may be famous one day tupacs_wifey's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    Everything is gone now not a smile nor regret
    Everythng is fine now all thats left is sweat
    Everything has its moment and now the moments gone
    Everything needs a purpose yours was to die

    this is my favorite stanza i love the poem

    HolderOfThe
    DarkChalice's LiL sis

  5. #13
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    thanks im glad you liked the poem i hope to do even better next time
    and i am still working on making someof the lines shorter like in the last part of them poem but im not sure how to yet
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  6. #14
    AO's Demon Slayer Hexxagon Champion, Match Stick Soccer Champion Blade X may be famous one day Blade X may be famous one day Blade X's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    O.O a self hurting poem here, very dark.

    it is quite a remasicent of some of my darker poems. very nice

    Thanks for the siggy Ky-lyrra

  7. #15
    Devil's Advocate TaurusDemon23 may be famous one day TaurusDemon23 may be famous one day TaurusDemon23's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    You like blood too, huh???????
    NoT tHe SiGgY yOu R lOOkInG 4
    Move Along.

  8. #16
    Newbie Nao Chan may be famous one day Nao Chan may be famous one day Nao Chan's Avatar
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    Re: Tears of pain

    it's so cool chris ^^ i liked it




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