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Thread: Thinking of you

  1. #1
    Newbie lovedloven may be famous one day lovedloven may be famous one day
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    Thinking of you

    'very day
    when i woke up
    I never want to think of you
    but
    I think of you
    Why ?
    You come to my life suddenly
    Then
    You out to my life easily
    why ?
    Because your family...
    and...
    I!
    thinking of you
    I cry alone in the darkness
    in the lonely night
    and
    when the time i think of you
    that I will lose you...
    You came to me
    ...
    thinking of you !
    Mong anh sẽ maĩ mãi nghĩ đến em, loven! v?* em cũng thế !

    --------

    tell me what do you see
    Yes I want to be free
    Yes I lose my mind...

  2. #2
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Thinking of you

    i like this poem alot but you could lenght in it a bit
    on each line but i like it alot good poem
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  3. #3
    Sorrow's Angel Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel's Avatar
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    Re: Thinking of you

    Wow,that was really good. I liked it very much.
    Made by- Ryomakurosaki (Thank you sooooo much!!) ^__^

  4. #4
    Otaku Heartless_mage may be famous one day Heartless_mage may be famous one day Heartless_mage's Avatar
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    Re: Thinking of you

    i agree with hodc, it is okay but just make each line longer

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  5. #5
    Elie Jelly elie26 may be famous one day elie26 may be famous one day elie26's Avatar
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    Re: Thinking of you

    New sorta style ^^
    At some parts, i gotta admit didn't sound quite logical...but yeah...nice try

  6. #6
    Newbie lovedloven may be famous one day lovedloven may be famous one day
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    Re: Thinking of you

    thx for reading ^^
    I'll try best and will post new poem
    Mong anh sẽ maĩ mãi nghĩ đến em, loven! v?* em cũng thế !

    --------

    tell me what do you see
    Yes I want to be free
    Yes I lose my mind...

  7. #7
    Newbie jervyn555 may be famous one day jervyn555 may be famous one day jervyn555's Avatar
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    Re: Thinking of you

    Wehhh....


    wahhhh




    sadasdas
    sdfasdf

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