+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 2 of 2

Thread: Where A Rainbow Ends

  1. #1
    Banned beast may be famous one day beast may be famous one day beast's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Michigan United States
    Thanked 132 Times in 126 Posts

    Where A Rainbow Ends

    I have seen so many things.
    From the throes of despair
    Lived higher than some kings.
    A museum opened to air.
    Stood over the tombs of legends.
    I have seen where a rainbow ends.

    Triumphs of the human soul,
    Burning passion, desire froze cold
    Dead cut short before their goal.
    Kyoto Temples made of gold.
    Saw the young to heaven fate sends.
    I have seen where a rainbow ends.

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to beast For This Useful Post:

    Frozen Rose (Sep 11, 2009)

  3. #2
    Newbie Japxican may be famous one day Japxican may be famous one day Japxican's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Here, there, anywhere...kinda like eating green eggs and ham.
    Thanked 8 Times in 8 Posts

    Re: Where A Rainbow Ends

    I like it. All the poems I've read that were written by you have great diction. The only thing I would say is that the poem feels a little short, like it should be going on for at least another stanza or two. It ends too abruptly. But I'm also a long poem sort of person, so that could be why.
    "desire froze cold" doesn't sound grammatically correct to me. I think it should be "frozen".

+ Reply to Thread

Similar Threads

  1. Somewhere over the rainbow
    By desxms in forum Cyber Lounge
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: Apr 27, 2009, 02:46 AM
  2. is this really how it ends?
    By starfire1036 in forum Poems
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: Oct 27, 2008, 12:46 PM
  3. It never ends...
    By atomik_sprout in forum Poems
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: May 22, 2007, 09:20 AM
  4. Rainbow Six: Vegas
    By jackpsp in forum Sensory Pleasures
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: Jan 06, 2007, 08:40 AM
  5. Rainbow
    By Sigma 210492 in forum The Thread Vault
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: Nov 27, 2006, 10:16 PM


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts