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Dec 30, 2007, 01:16 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
 Newbie  Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 65
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 Credits: 99 | This world I wake up in a world blanketed in snow No clouds to be seen no warm sun to sweat under This is a world of great lengths A world of great mystery In this world we see what we SEE Yet it's not what's really there We hear what we Hear Yet we hear no truth This is a world of great hate but has a lot of love to share A dominant place or so we would like to believe We live in a world of mystery A world of lies A world of wonders I wake up in this world today and I think "Is this paradise?" "or is it our hell?" Only I could imagine the world and see it as is Only I could look at the world and see life It's through these eyes That I see the world as a whole.
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| The Following User Says Thank You to 59wayz For This Useful Post: | BlueFox1 (Dec 30, 2007) |
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Dec 30, 2007, 01:25 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
 Upcoming Legend  Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: A place called Midnight Sun know as Tranquility
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Credits: 1,176 | Re: This world We live in a world of mystery A world of lies A world of wonders The only thing I see with this poem is the fourth stanza is a little short. Overall I think that you conveyed you thoughts very well and truthfully speaking the one who can see the world as paradise or hell is the one who is willing to step outside their shell and pursue life with No Fear! Nice job 59wayz!
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Dec 30, 2007, 01:49 PM
| #3 (permalink) |
 CHUCK NORRIS!!!  Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Minneapolis, MN
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Credits: 110,749 | Re: This world Indeed, this is a very nice poem! I happen to think this is the best one you've put up on AO so far. I like how you used the snow to state that people only see what they see and not what's truly there. Very good. ^_^ Kudos!!! ~S |
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