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Thread: The World of Pain

  1. #1
    Dragonrider Ichigo_06 is off to a good start Ichigo_06's Avatar
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    The World of Pain

    What is this pain,
    Why does it show?
    I know she is hurt,
    But she lets me know.

    This is a friend,
    Who I have helped,
    But yet she yells at me.
    All I can do is keep helping.

    Is something wrong,
    I ask, she starts yelling,
    lets talk, I say
    she starts talking.

    All the things she said,
    All she called me,
    We were not dating, and yet
    it feals as if a chunck has been torn.

    Torn from within, not without,
    Hurting, bleeding, for
    A friendship lost.
    will it mend?

    Will it heal? I hope so,
    I trust in friendship,
    It pains me so to see her mad.
    Let all be well, let all be good, not bad.
    sorry about this one guys just thought to post again. please let me know what you think and any suggestions you may have to make it better thanks.
    Last edited by Ichigo_06; Sep 25, 2007 at 06:14 PM.
    ナサン フォオツド
    Keep what you hold dear close for one day they may be gone forever!
    Make one person smile for it will continue to spread but if you make a frown that will spread as well.http://www.animeonline.net/gallery/s...0/ppuser/57173

  2. #2
    Otaku ice viper is off to a good start ice viper's Avatar
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    Re: The World of Pain

    WOW! Sorry that you feel that way. Hope things will work out with you. I can feel the emotions from your poem Ichigo. Good work, can't wait to read more from you.

  3. #3
    NalaMidnight Eggs Champion P.R. Princess may be famous one day P.R. Princess may be famous one day P.R. Princess's Avatar
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    Re: The World of Pain

    I think it was good.
    I really like it.
    There is alot of emotions
    and they are said soo well.
    Keep it up and hope to see more. ^.^

    ~Falling in love one step at a time~
    ~ MYSPACE~AWESOME PLACE TO SAVE~

  4. #4
    Dragonrider Ichigo_06 is off to a good start Ichigo_06's Avatar
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    Re: The World of Pain

    thanks guys. I appreciate your feed back. I really do and the fact that you like it is even better. thanks. next time it wont be such a sad theme.
    ナサン フォオツド
    Keep what you hold dear close for one day they may be gone forever!
    Make one person smile for it will continue to spread but if you make a frown that will spread as well.http://www.animeonline.net/gallery/s...0/ppuser/57173

  5. #5
    Otaku mixed fighter girl may be famous one day mixed fighter girl may be famous one day mixed fighter girl's Avatar
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    Re: The World of Pain

    hm well i think there was a spelling error. but besides that i thought it was really deep and like what the others said the poem screams the emotions and feelings that was written. i like it and it shows another side of friendship.
    .
    I will fight until i find what i'm looking for...you can not judge me on my apperence I am a Warrior. If you have a problem with me..... then my blades will meet your neck.

  6. #6
    Dragonrider Ichigo_06 is off to a good start Ichigo_06's Avatar
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    Re: The World of Pain

    thank you fighter girl I appreciate your feed back and oppinion I promiss the next one will be happy. and yeah I misspelled hellping. I will change it. lol sorry.
    ナサン フォオツド
    Keep what you hold dear close for one day they may be gone forever!
    Make one person smile for it will continue to spread but if you make a frown that will spread as well.http://www.animeonline.net/gallery/s...0/ppuser/57173

  7. #7
    Chtonian Slayer Astaroth may be famous one day Astaroth's Avatar
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    Re: The World of Pain

    Nice one!!!
    Beautifully written and meaningful words!!!!
    Great job!!!
    DO NOT MAKE ME UNLEASH MY INNER DEMON

  8. #8
    Dragonrider Ichigo_06 is off to a good start Ichigo_06's Avatar
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    Re: The World of Pain

    Thank you for your imput Astaroth. I appreciate all the imput and the fact people likes it makes it better thanks.
    ナサン フォオツド
    Keep what you hold dear close for one day they may be gone forever!
    Make one person smile for it will continue to spread but if you make a frown that will spread as well.http://www.animeonline.net/gallery/s...0/ppuser/57173

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