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Sep 13, 2006, 01:01 AM
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| King Of Darkness  Join Date: May 2006 Location: someplace where the only light is the moon above
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 Credits: 5,730 | You! The sadness is everywhere , can you see it? The pain is for free and no one care's, can you feel it? The tear's flow freely as the people walk by, did you notice? The bullet sings out in the night another child died, do you care? All thing's said , never once a does a head turn in concern. All things felt , not once did a hand try to stop the hurt. All thing's flowing,not a single shoulder was was given to them. All things cold,not a single rose was toss'ed on that nice wooden box. When the time for you're sadness comes, will they see you? When your pain is great ,will anyone walking by care ? When you're tears flow, did anyone notice you siting there in you're dispair? When that bullt take's you're life will anyone offer you a rose?
__________________  Last edited by HolderOfTheDarkChalice; Sep 13, 2006 at 01:14 AM. |
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Sep 13, 2006, 01:45 AM
| #2 (permalink) |
 Diamond in the Rough  Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Texas,USA
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Credits: 260 | Re: You! I liked this.. t'was.. interesting.. had much meaning and depth.. keep it up ^.^
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Sep 13, 2006, 02:02 AM
| #3 (permalink) |
| King Of Darkness Join Date: May 2006 Location: someplace where the only light is the moon above
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Credits: 5,730 | Re: You! thank you i am glad you liked it i actually tried following the rules but not sire i did for this poem, but i tried anyway. and the poem really did have a lot of meaning in it and i hope i can do this good again sometime
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Sep 13, 2006, 02:04 AM
| #4 (permalink) |
| Diamond in the Rough Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Texas,USA
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Credits: 260 | Re: You! bah.. poetry shouldn't have rules.. its poetry.. comes from the heart.. not the mind.. though do heed grammar so that others may understand what your message is ^.^. (Not commenting on the poem.. just a statement to the world)
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Sep 13, 2006, 02:12 AM
| #5 (permalink) |
| King Of Darkness Join Date: May 2006 Location: someplace where the only light is the moon above
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Credits: 5,730 | Re: You! thats cool thanks and your right but i sort of had to struggle with the spelling lol j/k but i di have fun while doing it i mean why do something you cant enjoy
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Sep 13, 2006, 02:16 AM
| #6 (permalink) |
| Diamond in the Rough Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Texas,USA
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Credits: 260 | Re: You! Exactly ... though to many people take poetry to seriously.. but then again.. maby I'm in the wrong for NOT taking it seriously.. eh heh.. but I DO have pieces that are serious.. so yeah.. just depends on your mood and state of mind perhaps.
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Sep 13, 2006, 02:28 AM
| #7 (permalink) |
 Devoted Otaku  Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: A place called Midnight Sun know as Tranquility
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Credits: 1,326 | Re: You! Hey Bro! Awesome Poem! The meaning and emotion are great! It makes you think who out there in the world really cares about you. I like the imagery given in this poem. Oustanding job Bro! BlueFox1 |
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Sep 13, 2006, 02:43 AM
| #8 (permalink) |
| King Of Darkness Join Date: May 2006 Location: someplace where the only light is the moon above
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Credits: 5,730 | Re: You! glad you liked man and got the imagry i ws going for that in this one, and yea i was going for the thought of who realy cares after the day is done, its really a good question i think
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Sep 13, 2006, 04:30 AM
| #11 (permalink) |
| Diamond in the Rough  Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: should i?
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Credits: 110 | Re: You! .... i wonder, what had you see until you made this poetry... but, i was a good poetry. Last edited by baikuza; Sep 13, 2006 at 04:31 AM. Reason: grammar thing. |
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