Thread: To date early or not

Marfie here:
why did you come up with this question anyway??? i'm not saying that this is not a good topic,, but i didn't thought that it would include a topic like this,,, thanks anyway, it refreshes mind about the world today...

Originally Posted by Miroku4444

If you did a good job raising them Arrianna, letting them date doesn't mean they will go out and have sex. Also watch out, if they have somebody they have a crush on, love, or think they like, they will find a way to be together and date in secret. A lot of times the ones who get pregnant come from strict parents.

lol making them wait until they are older is hardly being strict, it's called being a responsible parent and 16 is hardly the end of the world. Hint, it's part of that doing "a good job raising them".

Freindships and Early Relationships: Links to Sexual Intimacy
Watching Sex on Television Predicts Adolescent Initiation of Sexual Behavior

The factors that seem to effect early sexuality are:

1. Viewing (or hearing descriptions of) sexual behavior in visual mediums like TV.
2. Dating at a young age.
3. Having friends/dating peers in higher grades.

So if you know the facts why not set guidelines based on them including dating? Of course they should wait. It can effect their entire lives.

If you did a good job raising them Arrianna, letting them date doesn't mean they will go out and have sex.

And just becuase a kid goes out and has sex at an early age... it doesn't mean they were raised poorly. It more likely means that they've been influenced by their peers. And their parents (like soo many) were unable to prevent it. I mean... sex is no different than drugs or anything else kids influence eachother to do. You can attempt to instill all the morals and beleifs you want on a child. But at the end of the day you can't control their decisns... and you're not resposible for it, if they make bad ones. Even though it would stilbe your mess to help clean.

I know too... from a female prespective.... If she has what started out as an innocent crush on a guy. And this guy she admires so much, think's having sex with her is a good idea. It is easy to see how she might put impressing or pleasing him over anything her parents say. Thats just how adolescents are. Peers determine your status, not parents... Thusly peers often take presidence over parents when it comes to influnece.

Originally Posted by Arrianna

lol making them wait until they are older is hardly being strict, it's called being a responsible parent and 16 is hardly the end of the world. Hint, it's part of that doing "a good job raising them".

Freindships and Early Relationships: Links to Sexual Intimacy
Watching Sex on Television Predicts Adolescent Initiation of Sexual Behavior

The factors that seem to effect early sexuality are:

1. Viewing (or hearing descriptions of) sexual behavior in visual mediums like TV.
2. Dating at a young age.
3. Having friends/dating peers in higher grades.

So if you know the facts why not set guidelines based on them including dating? Of course they should wait. It can effect their entire lives.

Well no duh, when humans get close, date, and see stuff on tv it could result in sexual activity. Its just human nature when we get close, and show our love for each other, things can happen.

You forgot one on that list:

4) Not allowing teens to date

You think if all there friends are dating and having the times of their lives, and you outlaw them from these good times, they will obey. They will just date in secret. I know i would if that situation was placed on me when i was a kid.


I would just put a little trust in my kid, and keep an eye on them. Dating and being with friends its part of growing up process. I can tell them they cant date, but if they think their in love they will find a way. I rather talk to them about how things work and what can happen, and then trust in them.

Originally Posted by Miroku4444

You forgot one on that list:

4) Not allowing teens to date

You think if all there friends are dating and having the times of their lives, and you outlaw them from these good times, they will obey. They will just date in secret. I know i would if that situation was placed on me when i was a kid.

lol! And yet when my parents said I couldn't date until I was 16 I was fine with it as were the majority of my friends whose parents did the same thing. However my friends whose parents let them date young were the ones who got pregnant in high school or married at 18.

Nice try but the statistics say otherwise. Most kids whose parents say no don't rebel. The ones who do are either just rebellious anyway or have draconian parents whose strictness encompasses far more then just a dating age and set rules of behavior. It's not to hard to spot the difference once you've seen it.

well for me i am with dating early but i am not with is too XD .. and that becasue i don't want my kids date unless they are 16 or older becasue i want them to take the responsibility of there actions XD and i am with it becasue i don't want to say no to my kids becasue they want to date like other kids ^-^ .. but i will go after all with not allow to them to date unless 16 and up ... =^_^=

14? ive heard as young as 11 that kids were 'going out'. i mean it really depends. if its actually dating id have to say15 is appropriate, but nothing younger. i really is shocking how the new generation can be. haha, we just blow youre minds sometimes.