Inuruto

Okay..! Today I was watching CNN of a woman who gave her son's killer forgiveness... *That got me thinking*... So my question to all of you on AO is can you find it in your heart to forgive your love ones' killer so to speak.?. Why or why not.?. Do you even believe in forgiveness when something like that comes into play.?.

I also want to ask about that police officer who accidentally shot that 5 yr. old boy up in Oklahoma... If that was your child could you forgive him for what he did.?. Explain your reason...

I know how I feel on the matter some what & I will put my views/thoughts on the subject later, but I just want to know other peoples' will to forgive... Is it a lack of or to lenient.?. Do you believe in an eye for an eye.?. Such things like that...

This is a link to the mother who forgaved her son's killer...
Victim's mother forgives killer | ajc.com

This is a link to the officer who killed the 5yr. old boy...
FOXNews.com - Oklahoma Police Kill 5-Year Old Boy While Shooting at Snake - Local News | News Articles | National News | US News

fireandice

Well that's a tuff one. On one hand if it was an accident then yes I could forgive. Accidents happen all the time. But if it was intentional than I would have a real problem with it. Also if it was an useless act of violence I would have a hard time. To be truthful I would have to say no to begin with and then hope with the passing of time that I would be able to forgive. The question that you ask is hard for anyone to answer due to the fact that nobody really knows what they would do untill they are put into that situation. We all hope to do the right thing but that sometimes dosen't happen.

Peach_follows

Wow, this is a good question. My thoughts automatically shift to my kids and what I'd do\feel if it were them that died.

I think weather or not I could forgive would depend largely on why or how it happened. Was it an accident or was it intentional?

Even if it was an accident... I dunno. Like the whole cop shooting the kid. If it were my kid... I know Id at least be holding a grudge for quite some time.
But say it were my sister, and she backed out the driveway and accidently ran over my child. Thats different. Because I love my sister. And I know she loves my children. So I know she'd feel extremely horrible.

Ack...this is making my brain hurt... So all in all I'd say this. No matter how or why it happened. Its important to forgive becuase holding grudges only hurts oneself. This isn't to say I would be able to do it. But everyday I couldn't find it in my heart to do so... Id pray to find the strength. And, I'd hope eventually I could put my resentment, anger, or pain to rest.

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divine_punishment

Forgiveness is not born into humans; it is something we have to learn. We are initially very selfish beings (think back to childhood, esp. infancy, when your needs were most important to you). I've known people who have had to face their loved one's killer . . . I admire their courage. If it were me (which I hope it never is), I think it would be hard at first to accept not only that my loved one was dead but also that someone was responsible. After a time (and much prayer), I think I might be able to forgive that person. I mean, if John Paul II can forgive the guy who shot him and Jesus can forgive the people who betrayed Him and murdered Him brutally, then I think I can TRY to forgive a killer. That's what I think.

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gren

Maybe if it was a total freak accident, something that absolutely couldn't have been avoided, I might be able to at least work through the pain and rage I'd feel at a loved one's death at someone else's hands. But most "accidents" are the result of carelessness, recklessness, or stupidity, and any of those would make it unforgivable. I've never been in such a situation, and I hope I never will, but I already know that there's no room for forgiveness in me. As much as it would eat away at my life to be consumed with hatred and anger, I'd feel I was doing a disservice to my loved one by forgiving his/her killer; I might as well just piss on their grave while I'm at it.

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Gren's Music

Miroku4444

If it was an accident, like they lost control of their car and killed someone, yes i could forgive them. If they did it intentionally like they raped and brutally killed someone, no i could never forgive them. I might understand them in some circumstances, but not forgive.

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Mechazawa

Okay the cop is shooting at a snake, is it about to bite someone? If no, then is there no animal control in Oklahoma?......

Okay I just read that story, no sorry. No forgiveness for those cops, they didn't even tell the kids grandpa they where the ones shooting. And like I asked above is there no Animal control? Heck my father killed two rattle snakes just last week with a garden hoe, so firing a couple 9mm rounds at a snake in a tree wasn't needed.

As for a killer who hurt someone I cared about getting forgiven, not a chance. There would be no forgiveness even after I tortured the piece of crap to death. I would drop everything else in my life my goal would be vengeance/revenge whatever you want to call it.

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tsurara

I'm not a terribly forgiving person. Probably because I'm not a terribly religious one and can see very little practical application to pretending someone who has done something terrible isn't incredibly likely to turn around and do it again if you give them the chance.

In the case of someone intentionally (or out of sheer stupidity) taking the life of another human being (especially a loved one), I think forgiveness is one of the silliest things one could possibly expect (much less demand) from a victim.

My own father was killed by a man passing a mack truck on a double solid around a mountain curve: I won't forgive him. I don't dwell on it or make it my point in life to make his as miserable as humanly possible: but I did do my best to get his liscence taken away from him for as long as humanly possible.

Forgiveness is quite a lovely concept... but most people it's given to have done very little to deserve it.

Joe Mage

Well as far as the cops go, the article said that they didn' tell the grandpa that it was them that were shootin' in the woods. Yet I can' help but wonder, did they even know that they had shot a kid? The article said that evry1 admitted that it was an accident, we; as a society; have a tendecy ta forget that our law enforcement r human too, capable of makin' the same mistakes. If they knew that the kid had been shot, then it was their duty as officers of the law ta inform the grandfather that the shot came from them. Yet if they didn' then that's a different story, if u can find some more info on this matter then I can come ta a conclusion on this matter.

As far as the other, it would depend on whether or not they were truely remorseful. A little over 16 years ago, two men came ta my grandfather's house and pulled a gun on him and shot him. Why were they there? To rob him and when he refused ta give 'em anythin', one of them squeezed the trigger. My grandfather didn' help matters any by callin' them names when they demanded the money, the triggerman became enraged and shot him. However the other one masterminded the whole plot and set the other guy up as a patsy, he was goin' ta take the money and ditch the triggerman; leavin' him for the police. Luckily, things didn' work out the way he planned. U c, he knew my grandfather; he grew up around him. My grandfather used ta change his diapers when he was a baby and give him money through out his childhood for things whenever he asked. He knew my grandfather and knew that he wouldn' give up his money 'cause someone threatened him. So he set up the triggerman ta b his fall guy, all so he could get the 5000 dollars that my grandfather was supposed ta get. Only my grandfather hadn' gotten it yet, but they didn' know that.


The guy that shot him, he was truly remorseful for what he did. After he pleaded guilty, he came up ta my mom and apologized for what he did. He said that he knew that it wouldn' bring my grandfather back, but he had hoped it, at least, would put her mind at ease knowin' that the man who pulled the trigger had a conscious and was willin' ta pay for what he'd done. The mastermind, he laughed and joked in the courtroom wit the bailiff and thought he was goin' ta go home. He didn' know that the triggerman had turned states evidence and was the one that turned him in. The guy wound up gettin' the exact same sentence as the triggerman.

So I guess that I can forgive the triggerman for what he done, 'cause he truly wanted ta b forgiven and was truly remorseful for what he did. Yet the other guy, I can only imagine that he'd do it all again if he had the chance and the only thing he'd change was him gettin' caught.

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Inuruto

Okay I've read all of the post so far & there is good logic reason on what everyone is saying...

It's time for me to put my thoughts in the matter... To forgive is a ability that doesn't come easy... To let go all the hate, anger, anguish, & be contempt with the pain & hurt is also difficult... That's why I know it will be a difficult adversity for me to have the will to forgive, but I don't think it is impossible for me... I say that deep down in my heart because without the power to forgive we lose a piece of ourselves as humans...

Now on the other hand if forgiveness isn't sought from my love one's killer or a justification act isn't provided than maybe it will be a different story especially if the killer had no remorse for what he/she did... Even then after I came to live with the fact I probably tell he/she "I forgive them for what they done" just so I can have peace with my soul & the beginning of theirs...

I believe in vengeance when the killer keeps tormenting & it's no hope until he/she is brought to justice or death... Something like that movie the "Punisher" or "Eye for an Eye"... The killer stays free & can't be brought to justice cause of the legal system fails or rather the killer has the whole city under his/her thumbs (Too many crooked cops, etc.)... Even then to live for revenge you lost most of yourself as a person & it will bring no happiness even after you achieved it...

Well that is a lil on the matter...
If anyone objects or have different thoughts/views on the matter please don't hesitate... I want to know what everyones point of view on this matter...

Chaos105

Very hard decision. If that person killed someone very near to me on accident. It would be very hard to forgive that person even though it was an accident. Like Inuruto said, forgiveness doesn't come that easy. Though, if they killed someone near to me on purpose. I highly doubt that I would forgive that person.

Though, if it was someone I knew and they were killed in an accident. I probably would forgive that person, unless they make the same mistake again. They should learn after the first time. Though, other way around. If they killed them on purpose, I could never forgive someone who did that.

Killing, is wrong in my opinion. Though, there are many situations about killing that would get off topic. Forgiving a killer, very hard to let go of your emotions and give that type of forgiveness to him or her.

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