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Thread: The old Dating Double standard.....

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    Lady Barronmore Arrianna has become well known Arrianna has become well known Arrianna has become well known Arrianna's Avatar
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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    Now the real question is... do you mean dating more then one person at a time or having sex with more then one persona at a time? Two separate subjects (even though some people don't realize it) and a whole other can of worms.

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    Poultry Projectile Cannon Scourge is making a name for themselves Scourge is making a name for themselves Scourge's Avatar
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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Arrianna View Post
    Now the real question is... do you mean dating more then one person at a time or having sex with more then one persona at a time? Two separate subjects (even though some people don't realize it) and a whole other can of worms.
    True, very true. But as you said, sadly, most people can't tell the difference, which usually opens up the flood gates of hell. Meeting other people and sleeping with other people to tell who is the right one is VERY different indeed. Meeting multipal people shows your keeping your self in reserve, saving your self for the right person. Sleeping with multipal people, which has a name for which we all know and there for I don't need to say it. Sleeping around for the right person or what ever soon turns from looking for the right person to nothing more then shallow simple plesure. Which we can all agree is very wrong and vile.
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  4. #11
    Otaku Redsquire is off to a good start
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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    ... -Dons the cap of opposition-

    Then again, there are those who might NOT choose a relationship, simply for the matter that a general amount of their previous relationships SUCKED, and might sleep around, or date LOTS of people, whichever, simply out of unsureness, or not wanting to really have to "feel for" people. I won't ever say that monogomy is better or worse than any other lifestyle choice fully, because it really depends whats going on with a specific person overall. I know I got like that after I broke up with someone a few years back. She just dropped me like a rock. So I used people, because I'd been used. For a year and half until she went to University and found herself a 35 year old guy.

    Oh, by the way. -Vomits profusely, preferably all over ex and her older boyfriend-

    It's like... you sit there, night after night, wondering why you were so easy to be discarded. Why you are so easy to throw away. It gets pretty durned depressing. Luckily, I am a sunshine kindof fellow. I need to be in among the happy people. Otherwise I might MASSACRE a few folk. <3<3

    So I won't agree that it was simply very wrong and vile. You'd have to look at the overall behaviour and past of a single person before anyone can really make that kindof judgement, I think. Sometimes its a lifestyle choice, sometimes its a psychological thing, sometimes someone just needs "fixed". <---- In one way or the other. @_@

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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    I understand your point completely there Red, how ever I am sure you have heard the saying "Two wrongs don't make a right."
    Regardless of the cause it still doesn’t justify it as said person is then simply taking advantage of some one else because they them selves were taken advantage of which creates yet another cascading events which can be summed up by this analogy... "Sh*t rolls down hill."
    What ever the excuse and the effects it has on some one being physical or mental still doesn’t justify said action. It’s still wrong.

    Here is an example. It could be compared to some child being abused by their parents, who then becomes abusive them selves to his/her new family they started. You can spin this around any way you want; the fact of the mater is that it's still wrong.
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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    Yeah, I see where your coming from. <3
    I guess it all just depends on the person. : ( Some people would be all for the whole moral side of things, other people, (like me at the TIME at least) just won't care less. One could also say if it didn't happen in the first place, then the action wouldn't be given a single chance to be repeated in the first place.

    I'm not PARTICULARLY that way now, but yeah, that was a pretty messy time. I think if your pretty messed up about something a lot of the time it'll cloud your judgement, or sometimes you just won't care and want to feel better about yourself, somehow. I could argue forever about how you might just feel WORSE about yourself by doing what I did, but, meh, worked for me. I won't spin anything around, I'll simply end that by saying noone can really throw a judgement on it without looking over the whole picture.

    Everyones capable of being anything, good or bad, most don't. That's a good thing. <3

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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    If a person wants to date several people at once they can be the next Bachelor or Bachelorette on TV. The last Bachelor made himself the most hated man on tv by backing out of his engangement to be with the other woman.

    People get catty, their heart gets broken, there is crying and much emotion. The show makes it entertainment almost as if all these people are characters in a play, except that it is very real, with very real emotions, backstabbing, crying, rejection and cursing.

    When the Bachelorrette airs it happens all over again with the rose ceremony. One suitor is picked over all and they get enganged, but the show doesn't guarantee what happens between two people off camera. Sometimes the relationship works, sometimes it goes sour.

    There is a lot of kissing on the show, even steamy hot tub scenes. When a person is interesting enough they warrant those kind of private events with the bachelor or bachelorrette and it becomes like a strange exhibition of "worthiness".

    The ultimate goal is marriage and it is hard to watch. People just put themselves out there. All is fair in love and war... some just want to get on TV though. (The doctor didn't choose anybody)

    My sister prefers when the woman is choosing, the Bachelorrette, since they tend to choose men they could really fall in love with. Bachelors on the other hand have a tougher time choosing since they tend to choose based on whose heart they don't want to break, thinking choosing who they really want is selfish or are maybe they are just commitment phobic.

    Having all these multiple sometime partners makes for a dramatic tv show, watching folks getting jilted one by one brings back some painful memories. The road to love is a bumpy one, but one could still get their Jerry Beads at the Jerry Springer shows where full blown hostility can be safely expressed to the jeering of the audience.

    Doesn't matter if it is a woman or man having multiple dates... getting your heart broken is a risk one takes to lay it all on line, we can't be all people to one person or one person to all people.

    Even marriage, commitment or common law situations aren't a guarantee. Love takes time, effort, romance, creativity, lots of good sex, and choosing to play and kiss and be affectionate with your partner like no other or divorce, separation or annulment is just around the corner... like some tightwire act you either fall, lose your balance, or even things out and make it hopefully to the other side.

  9. #15
    Fallen Angel PhoenixSara may be famous one day PhoenixSara's Avatar
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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    Quote Originally Posted by desxms View Post
    The ultimate goal is marriage and it is hard to watch. People just put themselves out there. All is fair in love and war... some just want to get on TV though. (The doctor didn't choose anybody)

    My sister prefers when the woman is choosing, the Bachelorrette, since they tend to choose men they could really fall in love with. Bachelors on the other hand have a tougher time choosing since they tend to choose based on whose heart they don't want to break, thinking choosing who they really want is selfish or are maybe they are just commitment phobic.

    Having all these multiple sometime partners makes for a dramatic tv show, watching folks getting jilted one by one brings back some painful memories. The road to love is a bumpy one, but one could still get their Jerry Beads at the Jerry Springer shows where full blown hostility can be safely expressed to the jeering of the audience.

    Doesn't matter if it is a woman or man having multiple dates... getting your heart broken is a risk one takes to lay it all on line, we can't be all people to one person or one person to all people.
    .
    my point for openiing the thread is not glorify reality shows... you missed the point here in the discussion or the point i am trying to make....at this day and age is seems stupid for people to take sides when something is wrong in a relationship....as much as i would like to yell equality for women and stuff i guess men also have a say in how they are viewed...while dating multiple people shouldn't be an issue i would say loyalty and monogamy ultimately is something some people are afraid of....

    There are going to be men and women afraid in commitment and as such i think the way society views as the victim here is also much in question.
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    Re: The old Dating Double standard.....

    Quote Originally Posted by PhoenixSara View Post
    my point for openiing the thread is not glorify reality shows... you missed the point here in the discussion or the point i am trying to make....at this day and age is seems stupid for people to take sides when something is wrong in a relationship....as much as i would like to yell equality for women and stuff i guess men also have a say in how they are viewed...while dating multiple people shouldn't be an issue i would say loyalty and monogamy ultimately is something some people are afraid of....

    There are going to be men and women afraid in commitment and as such i think the way society views as the victim here is also much in question.
    And as such those people need to say from the get go what type of relationship it is going to be, because in the end their is going to be a winner and a loser when a relationship fails and society tends to favor the loyal party in the relationship (even if they are the villian). but if we are discussing about equality in a relationship for all, what do women prefer, for the man to pay for everything, to go dutch, or for the women to pay for everything, because their is a preassumption or a double standard in today world that a man has to pay for everything when it comes to dates (I should know, I pay for everything when I go on dates), if we are truly equal to each other, then why is it that the man is seen as the one who has to pay for everything still, (I have heard a couple of feminist who have said that the man has to pay on a date) I have no problem paying for my dates because it shows them that I am responsible, but how do females feel about this standard in dating, can you say it is truly equal to both sides?

    As for commitment in a relationship, if it is a couple who have decided to see each other, and stated what kind of relationship it is going to be, that is where I see where loyalty should be based on in that regard, if you are someones f### buddy then you should not cry about the other being with someone else because your relationship is based on sex and not a traditional relationship. but if both parties agree that they are seeing each other and only each other, then they have a certain type of loyalty to that other person, ring or not, so if some one cheats in that relationship I could see why the other will get upset, and it is up to both parties to resolve the issue otherwise it is nobody elses busness, unless it gets abusive.

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