View Poll Results: Sex Before Marriage

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Thread: Sex Before Marriage

  1. #49
    Ecchi Enthusiast Classic Donkey Kong Champion, Balloon Bomber Champion, Fishing Impossible Champion, Festival Of History : Archery Champion, Dare Devil Champion, Little Monkey Does Champion, Dragon Champion, Barty Champion, Cheesy Champion, Chicken Attack Champion, Moo Lander Champion, Hang Stan Champion, Hangaroo Champion, Sentenced Champion, Canadair Champion Miroku4444 may be famous one day Miroku4444 may be famous one day Miroku4444's Avatar
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    When you're married, you are free to have sex emotionally and physically. You know each other's boundaries, and sexual history (health wise, anyway). And you are prepared to have kids when not using protection. It's just better when you're married, because it is with the one you love, and there most likely will not be any regrets afterwards. Most people who have sex before marriage feel regret afterwards, and are down emotionally because either the person left them, or they just weren't "the one".
    No, you only know the persons sexual history form what they tell you. Unless both of you go b4 a doctor and get a check up.

  2. #50
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    I really have no say twords the issue, their are both good quallities and bad qualities about the subject. Sex before marriage can bring two people closer together and infact help a relationship, however this can also do the opposite and make the relationship fall apart it all the relationship would end. This all depends on the person's view points.

  3. #51
    Banned The White Wolf is off to a good start
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    Quote Originally Posted by Tbaism View Post
    I can see why it doesn't make sense to you. Someone that creates posts that contradict what their beliefs are, tend to lack the ability for following others.
    I can read and understand what others say perfectly. Unless of course, what they say is not posted clearly.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tbaism
    People have pasts and history. Little white lies, or skeletons in the closet. You have to ask a person whether or not they have had sex, who with, did they use protection, have any diseases and such. What if a person doesn't know or feels completely secure with their partner so they neglect checking. Just because you are married doesn't mean you are suddenly ready for the entire world to be thrown at you.
    Yes, but when you're married it's obviously because you feel comfortable with the other person, and aren't afraid to ask questions. If you are, well then you shouldn't be in a position where you're going to be spending the rest of your life with that same person you don't feel comfortable around, or vice versa.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tbaism
    That whole feeling regret afterwards..I would like to see some facts on that bit of info. Got a link to a website or something? Don't knock it till you try it. What makes some people feel regret afterwards isn't solely or mostly because they weren't married first, it is most likely because they regret who they first had sex with. And if you havn't ever experienced something before, how do you know what your boundaries are? No the real question is, how would you know what someone elses boundaries are?
    Have you even spoken to people who have sex and are not commited? Most people that I've seen post in this thread who have said they've had sex say they regret it because either the person left them, or it just didn't work out. Why don't you do some research if you'd like to find out.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tbaism
    Virgin on virgin action is strange, confusing, and downright inexperienced. You try to come out of that kind of situation and say everything is just peachy.
    What the hell is your point when you say that?

    Quote Originally Posted by Tbaism
    From what I understand, people can lie even when they are married. I wonder if saying I do and getting a piece of paper signed really removes the ability to tell lies. Makes you think aye?
    Of course they can lie, and they can also have sex without a worry in the world, just because they are married. It's official. Which means they aren't afraid of commitment. They're willing to go at it together. Where as sex without commitment is just sex, which can lower a person's self-esteem afterwards.

    @Miro: Yes, that is what I meant. They can get a check up, and by what they tell you, hoping they won't lie.

  4. #52
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    Quote Originally Posted by The White Wolf View Post


    I can read and understand what others say perfectly. Unless of course, what they say is not posted clearly.
    Maybe you should check that out more clearly, since it seems reading between the lines falls short with you.

    Quote Originally Posted by The White Wolf View Post

    Yes, but when you're married it's obviously because you feel comfortable with the other person, and aren't afraid to ask questions. If you are, well then you shouldn't be in a position where you're going to be spending the rest of your life with that same person you don't feel comfortable around, or vice versa..
    Well that is a very romantic statement, but in the real world plenty of marriages happen like that. Spending the rest of your life solely with one person, may sound amazing but it can be very scary. Not everyone is going to speak the entire past to them, or tell them every single little detail about them. If you start out dating young and during school, there is practically a whole new world you havn't seen of the other person. Not everyone spent half a decade with their spouse to get through every detail either. And form what I understand, people love to get married at a young age, so growing up is still in progress there. Experiences can still deeply change a person in 50-70 years. And what about those people who fall in love at first sight?

    Quote Originally Posted by The White Wolf View Post

    Have you even spoken to people who have sex and are not commited? Most people that I've seen post in this thread who have said they've had sex say they regret it because either the person left them, or it just didn't work out. Why don't you do some research if you'd like to find out.

    That is all good and dandy that you can bring up people in this thread. Sadly enough though, I can bring up a few thousand more. I meet those people daily, so I have plenty of research and reference since it is actually my job. Since I have had sex before marriage, it seems I will have 1 more opinion before you for a certain number of years still. I don't need to do research, I already have it stacked in bookcases and in boxes setting within my garage. So far I havn't mentioned a single thing aobut one night stands..seems you keep referring to that as if I have.

    Quote Originally Posted by The White Wolf View Post

    What the hell is your point when you say that?.
    You obviously don't know much about sex or the experiences, so I will let realize what I mean by experiecing yourelf, allowing me to chuckle freely. People who have experienced that should know to an extent as to what I am saying.

    Quote Originally Posted by The White Wolf View Post

    Of course they can lie, and they can also have sex without a worry in the world, just because they are married. It's official. Which means they aren't afraid of commitment. They're willing to go at it together. Where as sex without commitment is just sex, which can lower a person's self-esteem afterwards.
    Yes it can, it possibly could, it probably would, hey..there are options in that category. Who ever said marriage is the only commitment? Being is love isn't seen as a commitment or enough of a reason? Ladies and gents, being in love and feeling downright comfortable with your special someone isn't enough. You have to have a paper signed to consider it a real commitment.

    Just because they are married doesn't make bad sex good, or make a person who you despise in bed miraculous. People have needs and if you can't fulfill those needs, than you tend to seek it elsewhere. Having an affair doesn't solely interact with physical touch, but mental as well.

    If there is a problem in following my posts, it usually means something should be obvious enough that I don't have to put in down in typing. A little thought process can get you the answer.

  5. #53
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    I personally do not believe that people should engage in pre-marital sex. I am almost 24 yrs. old, and I am a virgin and I have also never been kissed. I have had two boyfriends, we just chose to not kiss. Alot of my other friends don't understand why we made that choice. One of them (who is not a virgin) actually tried to argue that if we didn't kiss or sleep together, how would we know if we had any chemistry? My response was "If I'm marrying the guy, we have chemistry. I wouldn't be walking down the aisle if we didn't." Some of my other friends have made the argument "what if yo uget married, and he's really bad in bed? Don't you think you shoudl find out first?" My response - seeing how my husband will be the first (and only guy) I will sleep with, to me, he will be the best in the world because I'll have nobody to compare him with.

    Another point I wanted to make is this: I read some of the past comments where people talk about the emotional aspect of it, and how sometimes when people engage in pre-marital sex they feel really embarrassed, or guilty. My friend has expressed this to me. Not only did she engage in pre-marital sex, but she was not even dating the guys. She told me that after she slept with them (2 different guys on different occasion) she never wanted to see, or talk to them ever again. She totally lost interest in them. Very bad news.

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  6. #54
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    Quote Originally Posted by MisMelS View Post
    I personally do not believe that people should engage in pre-marital sex. I am almost 24 yrs. old, and I am a virgin and I have also never been kissed. I have had two boyfriends, we just chose to not kiss. Alot of my other friends don't understand why we made that choice. One of them (who is not a virgin) actually tried to argue that if we didn't kiss or sleep together, how would we know if we had any chemistry? My response was "If I'm marrying the guy, we have chemistry. I wouldn't be walking down the aisle if we didn't." Some of my other friends have made the argument "what if yo uget married, and he's really bad in bed? Don't you think you shoudl find out first?" My response - seeing how my husband will be the first (and only guy) I will sleep with, to me, he will be the best in the world because I'll have nobody to compare him with.

    Another point I wanted to make is this: I read some of the past comments where people talk about the emotional aspect of it, and how sometimes when people engage in pre-marital sex they feel really embarrassed, or guilty. My friend has expressed this to me. Not only did she engage in pre-marital sex, but she was not even dating the guys. She told me that after she slept with them (2 different guys on different occasion) she never wanted to see, or talk to them ever again. She totally lost interest in them. Very bad news.

    I really like this post. Gives good examples and has a solid opinion from an all around point of view.

    I was kinda curious though, I have seen this done before in situations and have come across a few people who said this. Even though the only person they had sex with was their husband and didn't have anyone to compare with, they had plenty of people talking about their sex lives. I understand love can make sex all that much better, but if a person really isn't experiencing physical pleasure, wouldn't that frustrate them knowing others are? For me I see that train of thought can lead to destruction if/or the significant other doesn't respond sooner or later.

    Considering your friend, it seems those were mainly one night stands. One night stands don't usually involved many emotions besides lust and physical pleasure, so it would seem obvious that sleeping with someone you just met would mean nothing or disturbing. As I have stated before, you don't have to be married to be in a seriously commited relationship. I guess being married in your heart doesn't really count, or does it? A lot of people could never get married, but they never needed to, too know this person was their soulmate or one true love.

    I know you don't need it, but goodluck on your future marriage. Refreshingly pleasant.

  7. #55
    Ecchi Enthusiast Classic Donkey Kong Champion, Balloon Bomber Champion, Fishing Impossible Champion, Festival Of History : Archery Champion, Dare Devil Champion, Little Monkey Does Champion, Dragon Champion, Barty Champion, Cheesy Champion, Chicken Attack Champion, Moo Lander Champion, Hang Stan Champion, Hangaroo Champion, Sentenced Champion, Canadair Champion Miroku4444 may be famous one day Miroku4444 may be famous one day Miroku4444's Avatar
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    I personally do not believe that people should engage in pre-marital sex. I am almost 24 yrs. old, and I am a virgin and I have also never been kissed. I have had two boyfriends, we just chose to not kiss. Alot of my other friends don't understand why we made that choice. One of them (who is not a virgin) actually tried to argue that if we didn't kiss or sleep together, how would we know if we had any chemistry? My response was "If I'm marrying the guy, we have chemistry. I wouldn't be walking down the aisle if we didn't." Some of my other friends have made the argument "what if yo uget married, and he's really bad in bed? Don't you think you should find out first?" My response - seeing how my husband will be the first (and only guy) I will sleep with, to me, he will be the best in the world because I'll have nobody to compare him with.
    I bet this stems from the fact that your shy and have a fear of intimacy. You probably think the kissing and getting closer will change things and hurt the relationship, or you will get hurt mentally. Which you don't want to happen. Which i don't get, if you love somebody it only natural to express it thru intimacy and take the risk. For to be truly happy in life you need to take risks. If you don't have intimacy it just more of a friendship, not a boyfriend/ girlfriend thing.


    Now the waiting for marriage and being a virgin thing is probably more of a religious or personal decision. Something you feel is moral and just, which is a cool thing.

  8. #56
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    Re: Sex Before Marriage

    Quote Originally Posted by MisMelS View Post
    I personally do not believe that people should engage in pre-marital sex. I am almost 24 yrs. old, and I am a virgin and I have also never been kissed. I have had two boyfriends, we just chose to not kiss. Alot of my other friends don't understand why we made that choice. One of them (who is not a virgin) actually tried to argue that if we didn't kiss or sleep together, how would we know if we had any chemistry? My response was "If I'm marrying the guy, we have chemistry. I wouldn't be walking down the aisle if we didn't." Some of my other friends have made the argument "what if yo uget married, and he's really bad in bed? Don't you think you shoudl find out first?" My response - seeing how my husband will be the first (and only guy) I will sleep with, to me, he will be the best in the world because I'll have nobody to compare him with.

    Another point I wanted to make is this: I read some of the past comments where people talk about the emotional aspect of it, and how sometimes when people engage in pre-marital sex they feel really embarrassed, or guilty. My friend has expressed this to me. Not only did she engage in pre-marital sex, but she was not even dating the guys. She told me that after she slept with them (2 different guys on different occasion) she never wanted to see, or talk to them ever again. She totally lost interest in them. Very bad news.

    It is hard for me to imagine to not kissthe person you have as ur bf..... it is not hard to understand your view point of not having sex.... that's ok if you don't want to.... but to kiss? as Mirokku says it seems like you have some kind fear.... I'll reinforce what Mirokku says: if one loves a person one takes the risk.... Love has its risks and its advantages... one takes both... there is no such thing as: "they live happy forever..." With love there is going to be hurting... always..... but it is worthy when you find the real deal for you....
    and you find out that while being bf/gf.....
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