Thread: Should people who make the same mistakes over and over again be forgiven?

If they keep doing it they aren't sorry so forgiving them is meaningless until they stop doing it. It's important to call people on that sort of behavior to because if you don't but keep going, "it's ok", then there is never any incentive for them to actually change.

My brother was like that but i gave up on him and he changed some what. He doesn't do it over and over. It might happen two times a year. What i mean is doing the same thing over and over. And now snice he is going into the Army like me, he really has change.

But for other i tell them that if they keep on doing it i will have no part to do with them. Unless it is something small then i tell them i'm disapionted in them.

Originally Posted by Arrianna

If they keep doing it they aren't sorry so forgiving them is meaningless until they stop doing it. It's important to call people on that sort of behavior to because if you don't but keep going, "it's ok", then there is never any incentive for them to actually change.

I have to disagree, but only slightly. Yeah, if you make the same mistakes over and over, it gives people a reason to not forgive, BUT...

I happen to be one of those people who have made the same mistake over and over again. Unlike most of those people though, I was aware of my mistake and tried my damnedest to be aware of my actions in order to prevent the same sh*t from happening. But, old habits are hard to break--most of those habits people don't even know about conciously--and you can't really lead a horse to water and force him to drink. I believe that if the person is genuinely trying hard, giving it their all and is sincere about changing himself/herself in to a better person that they should be given a chance. They should be forgiven. But who's to say that the person won't slip up again? Hmm... I know that if I had promised to be a better person, to quit makin' the same mistakes and continued to do so without any remorse or consideration to others, I'd expect to not be forgiven.

I'm just lucky that the people I've dealt with could honestly see that I was trying to change, trying to break old habits and trying to be better. Otherwise, I'd be a pretty miserable person by now. Bratling is a prime example. Her and I used to go through these arguments which were based on my actions and habits. I promised that I would change my routines, drop old habits, etc. It took a considerable amount of time and I slipped up quite a few times, but she stuck with me, gave me a chance and eventually forgave me. (Thanks, you rock!!) You gotta know who you're dealin' with though, otherwise there's no point in forgiving anyone. At least not based on miniscule amounts of trust.

Sorry, I may have rambled in there somewhere. If I make no sense, please ask me to clarify anything that I've posted.

Originally Posted by atomik_sprout

I have to disagree, but only slightly. Yeah, if you make the same mistakes over and over, it gives people a reason to not forgive, BUT...

I happen to be one of those people who have made the same mistake over and over again. Unlike most of those people though, I was aware of my mistake and tried my damnedest to be aware of my actions in order to prevent the same sh*t from happening.
...
Sorry, I may have rambled in there somewhere. If I make no sense, please ask me to clarify anything that I've posted.

No, I agree but you said it yourself "Unlike most people". You can tell when someone really is trying. To not be supportive when they are trying is just wrong but when all they say is "sorry" then go on without trying or caring... that's not sorry that is just wanting to get a way with it.

There is nothing wrong with forgiveness but don't be stupid either. If they have proven they will do it and their apology is meaningless don't let them do it to you again. Call them on it and they will either change or go find someone else to take advantage of. For that matter you call them on it when they are trying to change, that is part of being supportive. "Dude, your doing it again. Cut it out." After all, what are friends for?

Ok I make a lot of mistakes yeah! But i would say not to forgive them if they are making the same mistake over and over again, but if its damll things then yeah but then go leaniate on it, and dont give them too much power, and contral, but I say it all depends on the mistakes that they made!

Well, I have had the same problem with an *ahem* exfriend of mine. It's because she kept hurting me for 4 years now and I kept forgiving her every time, thinking that I should be "nice". Well, finally, just last week, she hurt me AGAIN and I finally said "I'm through" and walked away from her. It was for the best, because hurting is not an enjoyable thing. So, yes, I do know how you feel.

Making mistakes is just another part of life. Everyone makes them, sometimes even when they don't realize it.

I am a very forgiving person. Maybe too forgiving you might say, I always want to see the good things in people and life. So no matter how many mistakes a person makes, if one apologizes, I forgive... it's just in my nature.

Even so, it's not like I'm forgiving a person right away. The person who made a mistake must show me somehow, that he/she is wrong. Apologizing doens't mean anything if the person doesn't even know why he/she is apologizing. Forgiveness only come at it's right when another knows they are wrong and they learn from it.

I do always forgive, but only when this person is saying it by heart. If I can see you're not serious in apologizing, I will keep on ignoring this person, and be a little bitch XD.