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Thread: Single Parenting

  1. #9
    anti-semantics Pub Quiz Champion tsurara may be famous one day tsurara may be famous one day tsurara's Avatar
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    Re: Single Parenting

    Quote Originally Posted by Peach_follows View Post
    OR that I am visiting a home with a computer and internet... Y'know, with it being the holidays and what have you visiting is quite common. .
    So use someone else's computer until you're back on your feet. Write reviews or articles freelance: you're a good writer obviously. Take a job stuffing envelopes at home. Do telemarketing...

    Thing is: if there's a will, there's usually a way.

    It's much more difficult and important to raise children than it is to hold a job. If you are capable of the former, I'd think you're capable of the latter. But again, I don't know your circumstances.

    Though, as someone who's struggled with asperger's syndrome (a mild form of autism) nearly all of my teenage and adult life and has had it affect my work and social life on more than a few occaisons: it's difficult for me to sympathize with your situation unless this problem of yours is diagnosed and has a name. In which case, I hope you're being treated for it and can get over it or learn to work around it.

    People without limbs and folks with down's syndrome are working at Walmart for heaven's sake.

    I still think that the job of a parent is to protect, care and PROVIDE FOR their children. If you can't do that, something's missing in the equation.

    Hope it's only temporary.

    I'm not trying to beat up on you personally... but people giving up (on just about anything) really gets my goat >_<;

  2. #10
    Femmebot Rehab Colt Crouse Champion, Bookworm Champion, Hangman Champion, Connect 2 Champion Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows's Avatar
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    Re: Single Parenting

    Quote Originally Posted by tsurara View Post
    So use someone else's computer until you're back on your feet. Write reviews or articles freelance: you're a good writer obviously. Take a job stuffing envelopes at home. Do telemarketing...

    Thing is: if there's a will, there's usually a way.

    It's much more difficult and important to raise children than it is to hold a job. If you are capable of the former, I'd think you're capable of the latter. But again, I don't know your circumstances.

    Though, as someone who's struggled with asperger's syndrome nearly all of my teenage and adult life: it's difficult for me to sympathize with your situation unless this problem of yours is diagnosed and has a name. In which case, I hope you're being treated for it and can get over it.

    I still think that the job of a parent is to protect, care and PROVIDE FOR their children. If you can't do that, something's missing in the equation.
    Well, If only my mom liked having me around enough to use her computer to benefit my life........

    But... shes a newly wed.

    Seriously though.... once I stabalize my mental health... I want to teach art. I fancy myself an artist. Id really like to further my education. Although to do so... I may need more hand outs. But mostly loans (like most people).

    I assure you, I am being treated. Although my treatment envolves more behavior modification... and less medication.
    I do what I can as a mom... By instinct and nature, I think I do ok (People have told me they were impressed) But, there is much intervention. Social workers, AHRMS workers, in home psychology, ECFE workers...ect.

    And my kids suffer through my learning process . Its hard for me to even keep a clean house. But where I lack in some places as a parent. I excel in others.

    Mostly though, I think we are in agreement. As I said earlier, I realize my situation is not ideal. I think Im missing alot more than a job from my equation right now.
    ... Not Ever Again...

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    anti-semantics Pub Quiz Champion tsurara may be famous one day tsurara may be famous one day tsurara's Avatar
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    Re: Single Parenting

    Quote Originally Posted by Peach_follows View Post
    Although to do so... I may need more hand outs. But mostly loans (like most people).
    I think you'll find that most people are more than happy to contribute to something that will give someone the tools they need to support themselves. The difficulty comes when they are required to pay for the day to day expenses of hundreds of thousands of people they'll never meet, many of whom don't seem inclined to do anything to change their rotten situation and can make nearly as much (or in rare cases, more) on Government aid than they can working crappy part-time jobs for minimum wage without sacrificing their personal time or expending any sort of effort.

    I'd rather personally hand you $1,000 toward college than pay a cent to any strangers' welfare fund.

    But I think you'll be pleasantly surprised by the amount of aid available to adult learners and those in rough financial situations. It's entirely possible (and likely) that with enough effort and applications to the right organizations, you can go to school for free (without counting on the government to do anything it doesn't already do for all other students who qualify). Though art school doesn't exactly lead to the most employability and "art teacher" is hardly ever a full time job anymore. You may be better off getting a general elementary or higher education degree (something that will qualify you to teach anything you have enough credits in... including art)

    If you can afford to pay your first year or two at any low-priced community college, fill your gen eds and get skyhigh grades, you can waltz into most 4 year institutions and get full scholarships in the process.

    A friend of mine had his childhood home burn down, a mother on welfare with 3 other kids, and a lawn littered in drug syringes... he graduated with the same degree and honors I did: and he didn't spend a dime. He still worked his butt off during summers working part-time at bagging groceries... then gave the money to his mom to help with his brothers and sisters.

    Which I suppose is testament enough to how single parents CAN raise awesome and successful kids AND how someone who comes from nothing can make something of themselves.

    Good luck.

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  5. #12
    Femmebot Rehab Colt Crouse Champion, Bookworm Champion, Hangman Champion, Connect 2 Champion Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows's Avatar
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    Red face Re: Single Parenting

    Quote Originally Posted by tsurara View Post
    I think you'll find that most people are more than happy to contribute to something that will give someone the tools they need to support themselves. The difficulty comes when they are required to pay for the day to day expenses of hundreds of thousands of people they'll never meet, many of whom don't seem inclined to do anything to change their rotten situation and can make nearly as much (or in rare cases, more) on Government aid than they can working crappy part-time jobs for minimum wage without sacrificing their personal time or expending any sort of effort.
    Yeah... my state has caught on to the baby factory mothers. Women who realize another baby is a higher welfare check. So, now you can only get cash assistance for the amount of children you have when you apply. I started with one... I get help for one. The second gets other assistance, but NOT cash.

    Quote Originally Posted by tsurara View Post

    Though art school doesn't exactly lead to the most employability and "art teacher" is hardly ever a full time job anymore. You may be better off getting a general elementary or higher education degree (something that will qualify you to teach anything you have enough credits in... including art)
    Yeah.. thats what my mother says too. And I thank you for your input. I haven't resarched how that would pan out really. All I know is that I love to speak, to interact, I like kids, and I love art. All of my previous education has been art based. I even went through quite the application process to get accepted to the highschool I went to... All based on my art skill. Its really one of the few things I think I do well.

    I grew up in a crime infested city... I've also wished I could get more involved in that community again. Some sort of outreach, public speaking.... But once again, Im not sure how that would work as a career.
    ... Not Ever Again...

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    Re: Single Parenting

    Peach, as a woman, I applaud you for holding it down. I know It may be hard raising kids on your own. You hold it down and I must pay my respect for that. I have my mother who is a single parent of four and she goes out and works and still takes care of the household. I appluad you for staying strong and NOT giving up when things get hard.
    And as your friend, I want you to PM me if you EVER need anything. Cant have my girl all unhappy for the holidays

    Born to rule, raised to lead, taught to establish: The African Queen

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    Re: Single Parenting

    Yeah single mothers/fathers get an applause from me. These days it must be hard to do. I was raised by both my mum and dad (infact..I don't know any one who was raise by a single parent..). But there is nothing different with single parents. They can be just as good (or even just as bad) and a couple raising children. Like with couples, it all depends on how the mother/father raises them. Not the fact that there is a mother or father missing.

  8. #15
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    Re: Single Parenting

    I dount it, A father cant raise a daughter as the same can be said for the other way. The parent does not know the experience the son or daughter is going through without the other half of the parentship.went through

  9. #16
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    Re: Single Parenting

    Quote Originally Posted by Peach_follows View Post
    Yeah... my state has caught on to the baby factory mothers. Women who realize another baby is a higher welfare check. So, now you can only get cash assistance for the amount of children you have when you apply. I started with one... I get help for one. The second gets other assistance, but NOT cash.


    Yeah.. thats what my mother says too. And I thank you for your input. I haven't resarched how that would pan out really. All I know is that I love to speak, to interact, I like kids, and I love art. All of my previous education has been art based. I even went through quite the application process to get accepted to the highschool I went to... All based on my art skill. Its really one of the few things I think I do well.

    I grew up in a crime infested city... I've also wished I could get more involved in that community again. Some sort of outreach, public speaking.... But once again, Im not sure how that would work as a career.

    ^_^ community outreach usually doesn't work out too well when you need the outreach yourself. i think that once you get settled with a job and everything, THEN that's when you can help out the community! i'm sure they'd appriciate the help, but i'm sure those two little guys of yours need your help too! then once they get older, you can take them along and show them that, though times are rough, people are going through a heckuva lot worse other places!

    everyone always says to be a teacher (i got the same "art isn't really a job" speech too), but what about a teacher's aid? i know schools (at least in the LA area) are always looking for TAs with everything they have to grade, and all you have to do is pass a backround check and a test! it's not much, but it's a paycheck! that's what my sister did while she was raising her daughter (practically alone, the dad was there but he's not much more then a cholo... i say that with love... kinda!). however, she was living at my parents house most of the time and didn't have to worry about food/rent/water/gas etc etc. and she was able to go to school at the same time! she just got her Bachelor's in (Child?) Psycology and got a job with the state 6 months after!

    ^_^ having kids doesn't mean putting your life on hold... but not having a job does! kids know when they have good parents, they're smarter then you think! they may not be able to say they went to school in a lexus or had gift-filled Christmases, but they will say that their mom was a hard worker and did everything she could to provide for them! and i think that's a lot better then what most could say about both their parents!

    ^_^ don't give up Peach!

    (ps.: to answer the thread, the children will turn out good (most times) if the parent/s are! sure, it helps when some else is there to pick them up or take them to the doctor... but at the end of the day, as long as the kids are clean, happy and healthy... who cares if it's only one person who's making it happen? it's a whole lot harder, but hey, aren't the little buggers worth it? ^_^ i think so!)

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