Miroku4444

Do you think its ok to invade your kids privacy if you think their in trouble or somethings bothering them? For example some parents have been known to put tracking devices on their cars, read their journals(diary's), and snoop on their PC's.

I for one wouldn't do this. I think you should have trust in your kids. I could never do something like read there diary, just seems so wrong. Id die if my parents did this to me. The only exception i could see, is in extreme circumstances. Like if they were kidnapped(For possible clues), or maybe if drugs were involved.

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"You'll hunt me. You'll condemn me, you'll set the dogs on me. But that's what has to happen."

HolderOfTheDarkChalice

If i had kids i wouldn't be there friend as much as i
would be there parent. And no i wouldn't do that but,
who said you could mess with them and make them think
your checking on them , i mean till there 18 there pretty much
under your house rules you pay there bill's cloths , Dr , food etc.

The only way i would see a need like you said would be if they were
dire circumstances but, leave them to there on devices to a point.
I mean how will they learn if you don't let them make mistakes thats how
they learn about life.

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_gwenibe_

If I thought there was something seriously wrong, then yes I would see what they were doing on the net. I don't think I would go as far as read there diary, like what miroku said, it just seems wrong. I am hopeing that I will have an open relationship with my kids and that if anything seriously wrong, they would come to me, with out me having to seek it out.

I think it can go to far though, like putting tracking devices on their cars. Trust goes both. If my parents ever did that to me, I would have never have trusted them again. If they don't trust me why should I trust them?

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Abu Dhabi

According to Soshi, i probably would.... and i don't really disagree.....

T_T sadly, i do have traits from my mother... more than i am willing to admit to... so i would probably open a diary, read a paragraph and become disgusted with myself and leave and make Soshi beat me up...

Kids have a life too... they have their own thoughts and stuff and they have a right to be themselves without being spyed on... it's a basic human luxury, and i wouldn't want to take that away from them...

it will be a f**K of a lot harder at the time.... ^_^ but that's why Soshi is here, we balance each other out...

best way to solve it? Good parenting. What is that? Something you can't teach, that's for damn sure!

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Legend

If you finally took action then, your kid is most likely dead. Or even if your kids not dead, he/she could already be sexually assaulted or maybe just traumatized by the whole incident. Personally I am someone who prefers preventive actions rather than acting when or after something happens. Read my kids' diary? No, because that would be a bit too far. We all have secrets of our own.

If my kid has an online journal, and I could find it then I will read it. Because now it is public, and it is fair game for me as much as anyone else to read it. Car tracking devices?? Yes, for several reasons. First of all, if my car got stolen I know where to find it. Second, it's probably going to be a car that is under MY name and under MY insurance. If something happens, guess who is going to pay for it. ME.

This might come off as a bit sexist, but if I were to have a daughter then you can expect me to invade her privacy a little bit. Everyone knows that "daddy's little angel" are great liars.

As God told Bender in Futurama, "If you do things right, people won't be sure if you've done anything at all." I rather have my kids hate me, then to see something happen to them that them and I would regret for the rest of my life.

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Lasura

There are some things that I think parents could do and it would be justified, like putting on tracking devices on their cars, can't see anything bad in that... It's just for safety they're not really interfering in your life like that... Just checking out, it's better than them calling time after time and asking where you are!
But I'm sure that reading their children journals is just wrong, children will tell everything they feel like sharing... You shouldn't interfere in anyones life like that! If there is no special reason for that, I agree that those reasons might be those whitch You mentined Miroku.

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aceman67

Absolutely wrong. while some discipline is needed, in order for children to grow into well rounded adults, some freedom is required, and the most important thing: Trust.

My parents trusted me growing up. They didn't care if I was out till late hours, even on school nights, as long as I let them know where I was.

Did I make mistakes? Yes, I did. I got addicted to pot, something that I'm still dealing with today, But part of growing up is making mistakes, and learning from them. With out doing that, you wind up not being ready to face the real world.

There's a reason they call 16 to 18 year olds "young adults".

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!The White Wolf

Oh my God!! This is EXACTLY what happened to me a few years back. She stormed into my room and took my diary; and then she locked herself in the bathroom to read the entire thing! Who the hell does that?!

She said she had done it because she was worried I was doing drugs or having sex. I mean, honestly. Just because I wasn't talking to her..

It is NOT right for a parent to go through their children's personal belongings. Email, diaries, text messages... it's not right. Those things are personal! ESPECIALLY diaries. Those are heartfelt conversations and expressions. I felt horrible when my mom went through those pages. Like she was cutting me in half and taking every last bit of me out of my body, slowly.. one by one. That's rediculous. If they [parents] think something is 'up', then they should try talking to the kids. But if the kids aren't talking.. they should lay off and go about doing things other ways. But going through your daughter's diary is definately wrong in my book, or going through your son's email messages.. that's also wrong. There isn't any need. It's a complete invasion of personal space, and if parents do that.. they cross the line. And their children lose their trust in them for a while.. possibly ever.

sangogirl

i understand that kids should have privacy and should be allowed to have a life of thier own (i currently live with my parents and am underaged so i have to deal with these kinds of problems every day) the thing is that a lot of kids are growing up in problems these days. A cousin of mine is getting married and having a kid at the age of 16 and his parents didn't even know about it after he got the girl pregnant and decided to get married. parents should have a way to know when something is up and have a way to know when he or she is not doing what they should. i not saying that they should look into someones dairy for no reason, but i mean if you take the case of those high school shooters, especially the one in columbia high school all of that could have been avoided if someone would have known how much help these kids needed, one of the shooters had a diary which was taken up and read through after the shooting happened and they found out that he had written about the shooting before it happened and found out how mentally depressed he had been from what he wrote. If someone would have read his diary before he died then perhaps they could have helped him before it was too late.

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Miroku4444

I can't believe she did that. I wouldn't have talked to her for a long time. Thats what some parents do, instead of trying to talk to your kids, they snoop thru their things to find out on there own whats wrong. Parents just don't have good relationships with there kids today.

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"You'll hunt me. You'll condemn me, you'll set the dogs on me. But that's what has to happen."

NevesElocin

If a parent thought their child was in trouble and couldn't tell them, then yes. But just for the sake of knowing every little nuance about them no. Thats putting up unnecessary boundaries on them. they won't trust the parent anymore.

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