Patrick Lussier My Bloody Valentine

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2 23071 20/3/2010
 
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100% of reviewers None indicated 5.0
Overview: We start off with some kids partying, but in 3-D. They live in a small town, dependent on the local mine for a reliable infrastructure. Harry Warden, a miner, goes absolutely crazy. His path of terror rips through a hospital, killing at least ten people. Meanwhile, the idiot teenagers have brought their party into the dark mines. Needless to say, all the high teenagers trip out. That is, most of them die. Young Tom Hanniger witness the dreadful of some teen, then the lawless shooting of pick-axe wielding Warden.

Skip ahead ten years. Media is buzzing around the town and one survivor, Axel Palmer has become sheriff, quaintly married to survivor and Tom's old sweetheart Sarah Mercer, now Palmer.

All hell breaks lose when Tom Hanniger shows up in town hell bent on selling the old, dark mines. Coincidentally Harry Warden is back with his pick-axe wielding, gas masking wearing self.

Did I mention this all happens on Valentine's day?

Review:

So this is pretty much one of those trendy movies only high teenagers actually enjoy more than once. The cast is for the most part gorgeous and tortured looking; jailbait for the mind. It's hard keeping pace with the movie as things tend to happen for no apparent reason. For instance: kids partying innocently BAM there's a serial killer cutting out everyone's heart. The tortured antihero is all brooding then BAM an ugly miniature pug prances on the screen, accompanied by uts dwarf master. he dies by the way.

Considering I saw this in the theater with the benefit of a huge screen and wicked sound system my review may be a bit biased.

The sound was amazing, when they where in a cave one could hear the echo of sound off every surface. Gun shots were accompanied by very relevant ricochet sounds, and death never sounded so personal.

After watching more than 30 movies I would say anyone could begin predicts the events of the movie. My Bloody Valentine is like watching the 29th movie but being able to call what'll happen next. It's the classic case of crazy ex returning, crazier than a bottle of Prozac. It's easy making assumptions when all the right clues are dropped yet subtle hints were given every now and then suggestion the opposite. Twice I questioned my prediction as to who the new killer was. In the end however, it actually is what you thought.

The movie was able to hold its own for much of its running time. The characters were strong and believable albeit a little too poetical and angsty for real life. More than once I wanted to shout at them to grow up and forget about that stuff. Though they all have mastered the sexy pout.

The action was relative and only reached that 1980's fever pitch once or twice, three times if we're nice. All the elements of the film worked well to their end. My eyes were searching the screen for little clues and nuances that gave away the parts I couldn't solve with my own common sense and mind. However, there were some very unbelievable scenes hiding in a movie that for the most part, eluded the viewer into thinking this was actually possible. That is to say, this movie was trying to be a serious situation et saying one man can lift a grown woman five feet into the air on a pick-axe. With one arm.

The actual look of the movie was amazing staying with dark tones to build the dire atmosphere. The sky was rarely clear and all the surfaces looked grungy. I suppose this isn't a big deal what with all the HD. THX breakthroughs. This movie was nicely complied in almost every aspect. If this were a tag I would compliment the designer on the composition, depth, sharpness, blurring effects, style, and maybe even on showmanship.

The entire venture was successful in my opinion, though many people at the theater were mumbling about its bad quality. I don't usually watch blood-and-guts movies (unless they feature zombies!) so I would have to say this movie was a modest achievement. I high recommend seeing the movie in a theater where you have access to wicked 3-D-vision.
Keywords: horror gore valentine teenagers
Sound & Graphics Excellent
Entertainment Value Very Good
Replay Value Average
Plot Average
Genre Horror
Starring Jenkins Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith
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  1. 4/2/2009 2:51pm
    1. NeoDeath90
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      All that combined with one of the best final words in a death scene I've ever heard.

      *looks face first into the sharp end of the pickaxe* "S**t......"

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  1. 20/3/2010 11:04pm
    1. defeo18
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